My Class Class Meets One Piece
by Fire Thief
Summary: Meet the Junior Class of Providence Private Academy. Even though almost all 19 of them have A.D.H.D, they were normal until Rick James opened up a cursed chest. Now they're in the world of One Piece and need to get home with the help of the Straw Hats.
1. This is all your fault Rick James!

_**(Ok, there are 19 people. This will mainly revolve around Zoey. These characters I based off of real people with learning disabilities. There's T.J., Grant, Chuck, Al, Anastasia but everyone calls her Ana, Gabbie, Pete, Bri, David, Ashley, Brian, Bobby-Joe, Rick-James, Val, Randy, Maggie, Jessica, Fort Knox which isn't his real name but that's where he's from so we call him that, and Zoey.)**_

Chapter One: THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT RICK-JAMES!

-Zoey's Point of View-

"And that concludes our tour of the Southern American History Museum class. Feel free to look around and go to the gift store." My teacher, Mrs. Rhodes said. We've been taking a tour of a boring museum of the South and all of us were sick of it and ready to kill the teacher if she even thought about telling us anymore lame historical facts.

"FINALLY! I thought that I would die of boredom!" Rick-James shouted out in joy and exhaust. He's the class clown out of our Junior class at Providence Private Academy. His 'pose' (a.k.a. the poor souls who he hangs out with against their will) includes Brian, David, Pete, and Grant.

"Yeah, 'bout time that we finished this dumb-ass tour." David said in annoyance. He's of Mexican decent, or at least he claims. Don't get in his way when he's kicking a soccer ball, you just might break a bone.

"Shut up both ya." Bri said. She's the one of the smart ones out of all of us insane people and the sanest. I was standing next to her and rolled my eyes at the guys as I replied with,

"Just look on the bright side you idiots, we got outta school. Or would you rather be taking Mr. Johnson's test right now?"

"Don't even bring that up Zoey. I got an 88 percent on his last test." Gabbie said as she stood behind me. Like me, she's from New Jersey forced to move to the hectic South. But that' about all we have in common.

"Only you, Val, and Bri would think that's a bad grade Gabbie." Al told her. He's pretty much the shortest guy in the grade. Don't tell him I told you this, but none of us are quite sure if he's gay or not. But I don't care; I went to New York City all the time when I lived up in New Jersey. Gay people are something that you see every day.

"Whatever. I don't know about ya'll, but I'm gonna look at the pirate section." Rick-James said as he just about dragged this 'pose' with him.

_Those poor unfortunate souls._

"As much as I hate to admit it, the pirate section was pretty cool. Especially that haunted treasure chest. Like anyone believes in curses these days." I said. Ana, the girl who's into the Inuyasha manga and forgets her homework all the time, got a surprised look on her face as she gasped,

"Zoey's agreeing with Rick-James?! It's the end of the world! Run fo yo lives" Val, the girl who speaks her mind all the time, threw her hands in the air and started to shout out,

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!"

"SAVE ME MOMMY!" Maggie shouted as she curled up in a fetal position. She's the only one of us who's been here since third grade. Most people leave our school after a year.

"Guys, stop making a scene, people are starting to stare." Jessica said in a quiet voice. She's the new girl who's trying to get used to our craziness. It was at that time that Pete, a new guy who gets sugar high just by looking at sugar, came running towards our group and said in gasps,

"Guys...Rick-James...opened the...cursed treasure box...and now...there's this...big-ass hole. You gotta see this!"

"Lets see...stay here, mingle until we die of boredom, or go see a big black hole that came from a cursed treasure chest...TO THE BLACK HOLE!" Fort Knox said. We call him Fort Knox because that's where he's from. No one really knows his real name...

"Maybe it'll suck Zoey and Bri in!" T.J. said with excitement. No one really knows how he got that nickname or what his real name is. With his and Fort Knox's nicknames, we can drive the teachers insane.

"Shut up T.J." Ashley told him. She's not only new to the school and state, but she's also new to the U.S.A. because last year she and her family moved here from Canada. She's shy, but very nice.

"Can we just GO?!" Bobby-Joe asked. He's a truth boy of the South with legs that can kick a soccer ball hard enough ta knock you out and fast enough to finish a mile in under six minutes.

"I'm with him!" Randy declared. He used to go to our school two years ago. He left last year, but came back this year.

_I am surrounded by weirdoes…_ With that, all fourteen of us ran to see the black hole.

"Holy shit..." Chuck said in amusement.

"You really weren't kidding Pete. That is one big-ass hole." Bobby-Joe said. I saw Rick-James putting his hand to the hole and I shouted,

"Are you nuts dude?! Do you know the possibilities of what could happen if you touch it?! Rule number one of black-holes-appearing-out-of-no-where-according-to-T.V: NEVER TOUCH THE HOLE!"

"Oh c'mon Zoey, what's the worst that could happen? The world being sucked into it?" Rick-James said

"YES!" We all shouted. He just rolled his eyes as he placed his hand on the hole. That's when the chaos started. The hole started to suck Rick-James in, but Brian grabbed Rick-James only to also start to be sucked in. I grabbed Brian, Ana grabbed me, Bri grabbed Ana, Randy grabbed her, and eventually everyone was trying to pull one another out of the hole with no effect. That's when we heard the big scary voice.

_**"Chosen ones, return to the world that the Pirate King called home!"**_

"IF WE DIE RICK-JAMES, IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT AND MY PARENTS ARE SOOOO SUEING YOUR PARENTS!" I shouted. With that, we were all sucked in and the hole closed behind us.

-Later-

I groaned and spat out a mouthful of sand. I heard Bobby-Joe say,

"Ok, who's not dead? Sound off people!" I heard many moans; one of them was my own.

"Where the hell are we?" Brian asked as he sat up. He's a shy guy of the South, but when he's talking, it's hard to get him to stop.

"SWEET! We're on a beach!" Gabbie shouted in joy.

"Nah, we're on a mountain that has sand and an ocean, OF COURSE WE'RE ON A FREAKIN' BEACH!" Grant said. He looks Mexican, but he's not. Don't get in the line of fire when he's throwing a baseball, you WILL be knocked out.

"We don't have time to get a tan, guys. We hafta find out if anyone else lives here." Val said as she stood up and started to take charge.

"Quit ruining the fun Val." T.J. said.

"Yeah Val, lets just hang." Rick-James said as he threw some sand at her. I walked over to him and slapped him upside the head.

"Shut up Rick-James! It's your fault that we're here in the first place! Now we're gonna do what Val says. GOT IT?!"

"Not really...OK I GOT IT!" Pete said in fear. When he disagreed, I shot him a glare.

"We're gonna pull through this...somehow."

"Personally, I think that Bri should be the leader," Val said. Bri got a scared look on her face and her right eye started to twitch.

"Why me?" she asked. Ashley put her hand on Bri's shoulder and said,

"Everyone, who is the most responsible and organized person in the grade that can be a great leader?" Everyone (except Pete, who shouted, 'ME!') immediately said at the same time,

"Bri,"

"Exactly! She's the best choice for our leader."

"In that case, I dub thee Leader, Bri!" I said to her. She smiled and said,

"Um...ok then. We should probably stay together at all times. Chuck, do you have your pocket knife with you?" He reached into his pocket and pulled out a Swiss Army Knife with a smile and said,

"I never leave home without it,"

"How'd ya get it through the museum security?" Ashley asked with a raised eyebrow. Chuck got a shifty look in his eyes and replied with,

"That's for me to know and you to never find out,"

"I'd never thought I'd be glad ta have a guy like you in my grade, Chuck," I said.

"Gee, thanks Zoey, I feel so appreciated," He said in a sarcastic voice. It was then that T.J. ruined the happy moment.

"Why should we listen to you?" T.J. asked with a small glare aimed at Bri. Val appeared next to him and punched him in the arm.

"OW! Geez, Val, you're not a girl! You're a guy when you punch! Are you sure that you're a girl?"

"He really shouldn't have said that..." Maggie said in a low voice. Val shot a glare at T.J. that could make an axe-wielding murderer afraid. Before they could fight, Bri got between them and said,

"Guys, now is not the time ta fight. We need ta work together ta get home. You can fight when we get back,"

"Yeah, save the fighting for math class guys," Brian said.

"Whatever," T.J. said before he walked towards Pete.

"Ok, here's the plan: We'll go though the jungle and try ta find someone who can help us," Bri told us. Chuck then got where she was going.

"And you want ta use my knife ta mark the trees that we've passed...very smart,"

"What if we get separated?" Gabbie asked. I thought for a minute before I said,

"Maybe we should be in pairs, just in case. A loud person in each pair so they can shout if they get lost,"

"Good idea, Zoey. Ok guys, pair up with loud people," Everyone paired up, and I was fortunate enough to be paired with Gabbie. Poor Maggie, she was paired with Rick-James.

_Ah…cruel fate and irony has paired up the loudest and the quietest._

"High-ho Silver...AWAY!" Pete shouted out as Bri led us into the jungle.

In that jungle, there were a bunch of plants and animals that I'd never seen before. I even saw a bird with a green beak and pink feathers.

"Wow, I've never seen a bird like that before," Grant said in amazement. It was then that a medium-sized rock hit Rick-James's head.

"OW! SON-OF-A-NIPPLE-TWISTER! Ok, who's the dead guy who did that?" He shouted out. We heard a little chatter and saw a monkey.

_Smart monkey to know right away ta throw the rock at Rick-James. I'd do the same thing, only I don't wanna get sued when get home..._ The monkey sort of looked like a normal Spider Monkey, but its tail was twice as long as a normal one and it had dark green and brown fur to camouflage it into the trees. Pete's eyes widened when he saw the monkey and shouted out in joy,

"SPIDER MONKEY!" Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that Pete loves Spider Monkeys?

"I'm gonna strangle that damn monkey!" Rick-James shouted out.

"Start the fire ya'll, 'cause we're havin' barbeque monkey tonight! Who's with me?" Bobby-Joe announced. Just about all the guys replied with a 'YEAH!' and started to throw rock at the monkey. It just easily dodged the rocks. Meanwhile, Pete was climbing up the tree.

"GOTCHA!" he yelled as he grabbed the monkey in his hands. The animal tried to wiggle out, but Pete got out some rope and made a leash for it.

"Good job, Pete! Now bring it down so we can eat it!" Al shouted up to him. Pete frantically shook his head 'no' and said,

"No! This is my Spider Monkey! I shall call him Chip and he shall be mine and he shall be my Chip,"

"Let it go guys. You know how he gets with Spider Monkeys," Ana sighed out.

"Yeah, but I've never seen him act like this before...Should we be afraid?" I asked. Brian simply answered me with,

"Yep," Pete came down with Chip, who was trying to escape.

"Hey guys! We found some fruit ta eat! we heard Chuck shout out. We rushed to his voice and saw him and Randy in front of a tree with low branches. Both of them were eating strange colored fruits that had swirls on them.

"Don't worry guys, the fruit's aren't gonna kill us. We saw a bird eat one a while ago and it didn't die," Randy told us. It was at that time that all of our stomachs growled.

"Well...It can't hurt to try," Bri said before everyone started to climb up and grab a fruit. I grabbed one that was purple with blue swirls that kinda looked like an apple. I took a bite of it, swallowed and made a grossed-out face.

"Ew...Chuck are ya tryin' ta...WHAT THE HELL?! VAL, YOU'RE HAIR IS ON FIRE!" It was true; her once long brown hair was up in flames.

"Huh?" Val said in confusion. "It doesn't feel like it's on fire..." She put her hands on her burning hair, but she didn't pull her hands away.

"You sure its on fire, Zoey? I don't feel it," It was then that we heard Al shout out,

"JESUS, MARY, JOESEPH, AND THE CAMEL, RICK-JAMES! YOU'RE MADE OF WATER!" I turned to look at Rick-James and saw that Al was right; His body was blue, see-through and looked like liquid. I walked up to him and started to poke him in his sides.

"Hey, this is fun!" I said abnormally loud. It was so loud in that just the sound waves broke down a tree.

"Great, now Zoey's louder than before, just what we need," David said sarcastically.

"Hey guys...I think something's wrong with me..." I heard Maggie say, but when I turned to look at her, all that was there were floating clothes. Bobby-Joe shouted out, "GYAH! Haunted clothing!" And with that, he sped off. But this time, he ran so fast, that he almost seemed invisible. When he came back he said,

"Hey ya'll, I just ran on water!" I then heard David say,

"Oh yeah, take a look at this!" I turned around only to see that David had a giant boulder in one arm above his head. The boulder could have easily been 2,000 pounds.

"That's nothing, look at this!" T.J. said. I looked at him to see that he had a mini rainstorm floating above his hand.

"Wow, a tiny storm, I'm so afraid," Brian said with sarcasm in his voice. It was then that Maggie snuck up behind him and scarred him by saying, 'boo!' The results? Razor-sharp bones came out of his body like projectiles, only to have the missing bones replaced in a second.

"Zoey! Take a look at this!" Gabbie shouted. I saw her close her eyes and watched her hair go from pink to purple and her skin gained a darker hue to it.

"Ok, so we got a liquidated class clown, an invisible girl, a girl with her hair on fire, a shape-shifting Northerner, a loud Northerner who just got even louder, a red-neck who can run on water, a Mexican with super strength, a midget who makes even tinier storms and I can shoot bones from my body...anyone else with freaky powers? If so speak now or forever hold your peace." Brian said. One by one, everyone else showed off their new powers.

Pete could move our shadows and then sucked a rock into the shadows. Grant shot webs from his fingertips and climbed on a tree like Spider-man. Chuck also shot knives from his hands. Al shot a laser beam from his eyes. Ana drew a picture of Inuyasha and he came to life, only to disappear 30 minutes later. Bri made a simple breeze and then made it into a tiny twister in her hands. Ashley moved a piece of the ground into the air. Randy turned his skin into metal. Jessica made some of the trees grow even taller. And Fort Knox made a rock get cut in half just by thinking about it.

"This is all your fault, Randy and Chuck! If you hadn't told us to eat those fruits, we'd still be normal!" I shouted to them, causing them to nearly be blown away.

"But we've never been normal, Zoey! We go ta Providence for cryin' out loud, that's not normal!" Randy protested as he held on to a tree for dear life.

"Zoey now's not the time to point fingers. Right now, we just need to get off this island...Bobby-Joe! Can you run around the island and try ta find if anyone lives here?" Bri asked the speed demon. He answered with,

"I already did. We're the only ones here...oh and a pirate ship is about a mile away from the beach were we started. It's weird, their Jolly Rodger has a straw hat on it,"

"WHY DIDN'T YOU BRING IT UP SOONER?!" Everyone shouted at him. Bri started to go into panic mode.

"Ok, we have three options: A. Hide until the pirates go away, B. Fight them, or C. Try to negotiate with them,"

"Yeah, that's what the Navy tried ta do with Black Beard, and look what happened to them! It took them like, a dozen bullets and sword wounds ta bring 'im down!" Grant said.

"Why don't we hide up on a ledge and when the pirates get close, we throw rocks and coconuts at them?" Ashley proposed. Bri gave it some thought.

"Sounds good, Ashley. Ok guys, that's the plan! Start gathering anything that can knock a person unconscious and bring them to that ledge we saw on the beach. MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!"


	2. Meet the Straw Hat Pirates!

My Class Meets One Piece Chapter 3: Meet the Straw-Hat Pirates!

"Coconuts?" Bri asked us. Al, T.J., and Ana held up bags of coconuts and replied with,

"Check."

"Small rocks?" Gabbie, Maggie, Ashley, and Jessica held up a bunch of small rocks and replied with,

"Check."

"Medium rocks?" Brian, Rick-James, Pete, and Fort Knox held up some medium-sized rocks and replied back with,

"Check."

"Big rocks? Bobby-Joe, Randy, and Chuck held up a few big rocks and managed to squeak out,

"Check."

"Big-ass rocks that only David can lift?" David held out some rocks above his head that could easily weigh more than a Hummer and coolly replied with,

"Check."

"Dug-out holes for them to fall through?" Ashley made a hole with her new powers and Jessica covered it up with some vines.

"We got about a dozen more of them near the beach Bri." Jessica told her.

"Mayonnaise?"

"We're on a deserted island Bri! Where the heck would we find mayonnaise? Why do we even need it?" Rick-James asked her.

"I dunno, I just always wanted to say that."

"Um guys? I just did a little run-through, the pirates are settin' their anchor." Bobby-Joe said. Bri went into army-commander mode.

"Alright guys, get these things up on the ledge! If all else fails, we fight with these freaky powers of ours! Lets do this!"

-With the Straw-Hat Pirates-

"YOSH! A new island! Sanji, make me a pirate lunchbox!" the idiotic pirate captain, Monkey D. Luffy told his chef, Sanji. Sanji kicked Luffy in the head and scolded him,

"You just ate!"

"Luffy, I'm going with you for two reasons: A. You get lost really easily and B. I wanna map the island," the red-headed navigator, Nami told her captain. The green-haired swordsman next to her yawned and said,

"I think I'll go to, it's been forever since I've been off this boat,"

"Ok Zoro, do you wanna come too, Sanji-kun?" Nami asked the cook. His visible eye turned into a heart as he answered with,

"Where you go, I go, Nami-Swan!"

"I would like to go too Navigator-san. Maybe I'll find some history books in town if there is one," the newest member of the crew, Nico Robin said.

"Robin-Chan, you're so smart!" Sanji told her as he just about floated on hearts around her and Nami.

"C'mon guys! I wanna go on the island!"

"Sugoi! (Cool in Japanese) Look at that bird Zoro!" Luffy shouted out. Although Luffy is a pirate captain, he has the attention span of a ferret. (Much like the people in my class...I am one of them...oh! shiny nickel!)

"This island's animals are very odd," Robin said.

"MELLORINE!" Sanji shouted out as he was floating around on hearts. That's when they heard a scary voice out of no where say,

"_**LEAVE NOW PIRATES AND NEVER RETURN OR FACE YOUR DEATH**_!"

-Back to Zoey-

"Do ya think it worked?" I whispered to Ana. We got our response in a heartbeat.

"SUGOI! A mystery island! Nami! We gotta stay!"

"You've got to be kidding me..." Fort Knox said with disbelief in his voice.

"Bobby-Joe, are you sure that their pirates?" T.J. asked.

"I don't really know anymore," he replied.

"I don't know about you guys, but I got dibs on the guy with three swords! He's hot and ripped!" Val said enthusiastically.

"I want him!" Gabbie whined.

"Forget about him, I call the blonde guy!" Jessica said.

"I'll share with you!" Ashley replied. "But we'll hafta stop him from smoking,"

"Deal!" Jessica said as they shook one another's hands.

"Shut the heck up guys! They might hear us! Lemme try spooking them off again!" I shouted silently.

_Although those pirates look very familiar..._ I took a deep breath and boomed out in a deep voice,

"_**PIRATES! YOU ARE NOT WELCOME ON THIS ISLAND! LEAVE OR FACE CERTAIN PAIN AND AGONY AS YOU DIE**_!"

"You kids can come out now," the black haired woman said calmly.

"We mean no harm," the green haired one said.

"Crap! Plan B! Plan B damnit!" Bri shouted as she started to panic. We took the hint and started to throw the coconuts and the rocks. The swordsman pulled out two swords and said,

"_**Nitōryū: Takanami! (Two sword style: Hawk Wave)**_!" He slashed at the air and the projectiles were cut in half by the shockwave. But it didn't stop there, the shockwave kept coming at us.

"Somebody do something before we all die!" Randy pleaded. Ashley made an upward sweeping motion with her hands and a wall of earth came and protected us.

"Thank you Ashley! When we get home, I am so taking you to the prom!" Randy said as he hugged her. That's when we heard,

"_**Ojo's Fluer**_." and we saw hand pop out of the ground with eyeballs in their palms.

"SON OF AN ORGAN DONOR!" Rick-James shouted.

"Abort! Abort! Plan C everyone! Plan C damnit!" Bri shouted out to us.

"Geez, Bri, I didn't know you had such a potty mouth," T.J. said.

"Forget about it and...ATTACK!" With that, the stampede down the ledge began.

-Straw Hat Pirates POV-

"Hey guys! Look at the kids!" Luffy said with a smile on his face. Sanji's eye turned into a heart again.

"There're some pretty girls!" Zoro just smirked and put one of his swords away.

"One sword is enough to beat these kids," It was then that one of them, a blonde guy, shot multiple knives from his hands.

"Sonofabitch! Some of 'em ate Devil Fruits!" he shouted out as he deflected them with his swords. A guy started running faster and faster until he was just a blur around Sanji.

"You can't attack what you can't see you dumb-ass pirate!" Sanji tried to kick at him, but he just dodged the kicks easily. A girl with silver hair made a pushing movement with her hands towards Robin and spikes made of earth came towards the archeologist. Zoro did _**Nitōryū: Takanami**_ again at the spikes, cutting them in half.

"Arigato Swordsman-san. Now if I may...Grande Fleur," Robin replied as she crossed her arms and many hands sprouted from the ground and from their bodies and held the kids.

"Do you seriously think that'll hold us? Brian, Chuck, Rick-James, Val, Fort Knox, David, and Maggie! Do your stuff guys!" The girl with turquoise hair ordered, she was most likely their leader. Some of the kids nodded and...changed. The guy with spiky blonde hair turned into water. The blonde from before shot knives from his body and stabbed the arms encasing him. A guy with spiky brown hair did the same, only it was bones. A girl with long black hair turned invisible, and the hands around her disappeared since they didn't have anything to hold onto.

A girl with long brown hair squinted for a moment before she turned into fire, burning the hands. A guy with curly black hair broke free of the hands by strength alone. "Did ja really think that you could hold us like that? Man, you're outta wack," the guy made of water taunted.

"HE JUST TURNED INTO WATER! THAT WATER MAN IS A FREAK!" Luffy shouted as an invisible arrow pointed at him and said, 'Rubber Man'.

"I AM A FREAK AND I AM PROUD OF IT!"

"Heh, alright then freak. I've been itchin' for a fight for a while." Zoro said as he readied his swords.

"Well if it's a fight you want, we'll give you one hellofva fight!" The strong guy told him. Luffy smiled and stretched his arm back while saying,

"Gomu-Gomu no...PISTOL!" he let the fist go and it came right back to David, who managed to stand his ground.

"Nice try asshole, but now it's our turn," the fire-girl told the captain. She pointed her right pointer finger towards Sanji and fire erupted from the fingertip.

"A pretty lady like you shouldn't fight, you might get hurt," Sanji said as he simply ticked at the fire and the sheer force of his kick put the fire out. "If you play with fire, you'll get burned," He coolly said.

"So you're gonna go easy on me because I'm a girl? I don't think so. And the name's Val," She angrily replied.

"Such a lovely name for an even lovelier woman!" Sanji said as his eye turned into a heart.

"_**Oni Giri (Demon Blade)**_!" the swordsman shouted as he sliced at Val with his swords. Three long and deep cuts appeared on Val's torso that started to heavily bleed.

"VAL!" I shouted out.

"F_**CENCORED**_ing pirates! I used ta think that ya'll were cool, but this shit is too much!" Rick-James yelled.

"And to think I thought that you were hot!" Gabbie said towards the swordsman. Sanji kicked him in the head and said,

"That's no way to treat a lady shitty marimo!"

"She was about to burn you and all you were doing was flirting ero-cook!"

"You wanna fight, Zoro?!"

"Bring it!"

"SHUT UP!" Nami shouted out as she hit them both in the head with her Clima-Tact. She walked up to the struggling Bri and told her,

"We honestly mean no harm. Now, you can either not trust us and let your friend bleed to death, or you can trust us and we'll take her to our doctor on our ship. What's it gonna be?"

"It's not like we have much of a choice, Bri. Val needs a doctor and now," Pete told her as he sadly looked at Maggie attempting to stop the bleeding from the fallen Val. Bri took a breath in and said,

"Fine, we don't want any funny business. Just please save our classmate!" Robin gave a slight smile and made the hands disappear. Finally free, I took off my jacket that I was wearing and covered Val's wounds with it.

"We shouldn't move her, it'll only make her injuries worse," Jessica told us. Bobby-Joe spoke up,

"I can run to ya'lls ship and get your doctor,"

"Just hurry man! Val ain't gonna last that long!" Fort Knox ordered him.

"Fine, you don't hafta yell man!" With that, he sped off.

"I guess ya'll wanna know our names?" Ana asked them.

"I would love to learn your name fair angel of heaven!" Sanji said as he grasped her hand in his.

"Wow, someone thinks Ana's pretty!" T.J. joked. I kicked him in the shin.

"Ok guys, ROLL CALL FOR THE GUYS!" Bri shouted.

"Al!"

"Bobby-Joe's the one who ran ta get ya'll doctor, but I'm Brian!"

"Chuck!"

"David!"

"Fort Knox! No, that's not my real name, but everyone calls me it!"

"Grant!"

"Pete and this is my monkey, Chip!"

"Randy!"

"I'm Rick-James bitch!"

"'An I'm T.J.! Don't ask what it stands for!"

"Alright ladies, ROLL CALL!" Bri shouted out.

"Anastasia! But since it's so long, everyone calls me Ana!"

"Ashley!"

"Bri!"

"Gabbie!"

"Jessica!"

"Maggie!"

"Val's bleeding, and then comes me, Zoey!" I finished. "What are you names?"

"I'm Monkey D. Luffy, and I'm gonna be King of the Pirates!"

"The name's Roronoa Zoro. Sorry 'bout your friend by the way,"

"My lovely angels, I am Sanji!"

"Ignore those guys, I'm Nami,"

"I am please to meet you all, I am Nico Robin,"

It was then, among all of the chaos of Val injured, us not knowing where the heck we were, a light bulb went off above my head.

"Holy snap crack and pot guys! I know where we are!"

"Where are we, Zoey?" Chuck asked.

"I'll show you hang on..." I opened my backpack, reached in and pulled out a manga titled, One Piece.

"I can't believe I didn't realize it before! We're in One Piece guys!" I said as I started flipping through the pages.

"We're in you Japanese porn?" Chuck asked. I kicked him in the shin, causing him to jump up and down on one foot. I like using Japanese words in my sentences and always have a manga in my backpack. Chuck makes fun of me saying that it's really Japanese porn. Usually I kick him senseless in the shins when he says that.

"It's not porn damnit!" I shouted at him while kicking him in both of his shins.

"Ignoring Chucks comment about meh awsomely-awsome manga, One Piece is the story about a boy who lives in a world of pirates. As a kid, he ate the Gomu-Gomu no Mi, the Gum-Gum Fruit. He dreams of becoming the King of the Pirates by finding the treasure left behind by the last king, Gol D. Rodger. The treasure is called, 'One Piece'. He gathers a small crew and they go on all weird adventures," I reported. I opened to a picture that showed the crew and pointed them out and said their names and positions,

"The Captain, Monkey D. Luffy. The First Mate and Swordsman, Roronoa Zoro. The Navigator, Nami. The Sharpshooter, Ussop. The Cook, Sanji. The Doctor, Tony Tony Chopper. And the newest member of the crew, the Arceologist, Nico Robin! Omigosh! You guys really are the Straw-Hat pirates!"

"Hang on, we're in a book?" Nami asked.

"If you wanna be exact, Nami, it's a manga and an anime created by Eiichiro Oda-sensei," I told her.

"Lemme see that!" Luffy shouted as he stretched his arm and grabbed my book.

"Hey guys! This is when I was fighting Crocodile! I look really cool!" he told them.

"So are you telling us that our lives have been entertainment for people where you come from?" Robin asked.

"I dunno really, you would hafta ask Oda-sensei that," I told her.

"Stop callin him Sensei, Zoey, it's getting annoying!" Rick-James complained.

"Sensei is a form of respect baka," I told him."Oh Zoey-Chan is so smar-" Sanji started but was interrupted when I shot him a glare. The gift of death glares run in my family. My Dad can do his so well that he could make a serial killer cry and wet his pants. My glares are enough to make a grown man cry if I wanted them to. But this one could make a five year-old cry. Sanji tried flirting again, this time with Gabbie,

"Oh lovely Ga-" but since Gabbie spent a lot of time in New York City, capital of perverts, she immediately stomped on his foot and kneed him in the balls.

"PERVERT!" she shouted at him as she stomped away to stand by Val, with most of the girls following her. As Sanji fell to the ground, clutching the family jewels, Zoro laughed hard.

"That's what you get ero-cook,"

"Should we really be laughing like this? I mean, Val's bleeding ta death," Fort Knox pointed out.

"Do my ear deceive me or did Fort Knox actually care about Val for a second?" Maggie asked. We didn't have time to answer before Bobby-Joe showed up with a reindeer and a teen shivering in his arms. The reindeer hat a pink hat on with his antlers poking out of them and he was about the size of my sister, Grace, when she was two years old.

_Aw...so kawaii!_

The teen that Bobby-Joe had in his arms wore brown boots and overalls and a bandana covering his black curly hair. He carried a back and over his bandana were goggles.

"GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY MAN, YOUR NOSE IS LONG!" Rick-James shouted out as he pointed at the shaking teen. He jumped out of Bobby-Joe's arms and said,

"How dare you insult the great Captain Ussop? Do you wish for my 1,000 men to hunt you down?" At the same time, my entire class said,

"Liar," His head fell in disappointment.

"Guys, this is our doctor, Tony Tony Chopper," Nami introduced us to the animal. All of the girls ran to him and started to hug him.

"He's so cute!" Jessica said.

"I just wanna dunk him in my coffee and eat him up!" Ana replied. He jumped out of our arms and started to dance and smile while saying

"I'm not cute assholes!"

"A reindeer is your doctor?" Grant asked.

"I thought he was gonna be dinner," Rick-James said.

"He may not look like it, but he's one of the best doctors around, right Chopper?" Sanji told us. Chopper started to dance again and smile even wider while saying

"Just because you compliment me doesn't me I'm happy you jerk! Asshole!"

"Um...Chopper, Val is bleeding to death right now...can you do something?" Maggie said as she continued to put pressure on her wounds.

"Right! Ussop, hand me the needle and thread!" Chopper demanded. Ussop opened his bag and took out the needed items and handed it to the animal.

"Aren't ya'll gonna use anesthesia?" Bobby-Joe asked.

"What's that?" Chopper asked as he started to sew the wound up.

"Ya'll don't have somethin' ta numb her?" David asked in disbelief.

"We're pirates, its not like we can walk into a store and ask for it.' Zoro said as he sat down.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Bri said as she covered her mouth with her hands and ran away. Gabbie, Ashley, Jessica, Maggie, Al, and Fort Knox did the same thing and ran behind bushes.

"Oh c'mon Bri! You watch 'Grey's Anatomy' on TV all the time! This should be nothing! And don't forget about the flying pig fetus incident, this is a papercut compared to what that thing went through!" I yelled to her.

"What's a Tee Vee?" Sanji asked as he stood clear away from the girls. Most likely he didn't want to be kneed again and want to have kids in the near future. At this comment, our eyes widened.

"How the hell do you not know what TV is?" Rick-James shouted.

"It's only the greatest thing ever invented, next ta the computer!" Brian said.

"What is a computer?" Robin asked.

"No TV...that means... n-no '24' is Jack alive? And...No internet...I HAVE DIED AND GONE TO HELL!" Pete yelled.

"Find a happy place...find a happy place," Al murmured to himself as he rocked back and forth in a fetal position on the ground.

"How are we gonna get home?" Pete asked Chip.

"Crap! I think I left the stove on at home!" Bri said.

"Sweet! No homework!" T.J. said happily.

"Crud, I forgot ta take my pills this morning. I feel sorry for ya'll," Grant told the pirates.

"Robin, Nami, do you guys know what we should do? You both are two of the smartest people in the story," I asked them.

"Well, you might as well be in another world by the strange devices that you have and the fact that we are a book series," Robin proposed.

"That's it, you guys are joining my crew!" Luffy announced.

"That's not such a good idea Luffy," Bri said slowly.

"Why not? I'm the Captain, and what I say goes!" he replied.

"I'm sure that most of us want ta join your crew, but...we're a class where most of us have A.D.H.D and dyslexia. If we don't have our meds, we'll be bouncing off the walls by morning," Bri explained.

"Those things won't stop me from loving you, Bri-Chan!" Sanji said as his eye became a heart again.

"Sanji, A.D.H.D. is short for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. To make it simple, without the prescribed medicine, almost all of us have memory spans of rats and bouncing off the walls. Dyslexia is a learning problem when you always have a hard time reading and writing," Ana explained to the love struck chef.

"That sounds like Luffy," Zoro pointed out."Ok! Val is done getting stitched up! Just make sure that her bandages are changed daily," Chopper told us as he put away his doctor supplies.

"Thanks Chopper," Jessica told him.

"Zoro, you can carry her to the Going Merry," Luffy told his first mate. "And you can put her in the girl's room where the girls will stay,"

"WE'RE NOT JOINING YOUR CREW!" My class and I shouted at the same time.

_He really is as persistent as he is in the manga._

"Give it up, guys. Luffy kept asking us until we joined," Nami told us. "Even though I hated pirates, he still made me join even before he knew I could be a navigator," she continued.

"I used to be a pirate hunter, but he kept bugging me so I joined," Zoro replied.

"Well, it's up ta Bri really, she's our leader," Al pointed out.


	3. Room Assignments, oh joy

My Class Meets One Piece Chapter3:  
Room Assignments...oh joy...

* * *

_Last time:_

_"That's it, you guys are joining my crew!" Luffy announced._

_"That's not such a good idea Luffy," Bri said slowly._

_"Why not? I'm the Captain, and what I say goes!" he replied._

_"I'm sure that most of us want ta join your crew, but...we're a class where most of us have A.D.H.D and dyslexia. If we don't have our meds, we'll be bouncing off the walls by morning," Bri explained._

_"Those things won't stop me from loving you, Bri-Chan!" Sanji said as his eye became a heart again._

_"Sanji, A.D.H.D. is short for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. To make it simple, without the prescribed medicine, almost all of us have memory spans of rats and bouncing off the walls. Dyslexia is a learning problem when you always have a hard time reading and writing," Ana explained to the love struck chef._

_"That sounds like Luffy," Zoro pointed out._

_"Ok! Val is done getting stitched up! Just make sure that her bandages are changed daily," Chopper told us as he put away his doctor supplies._

_"Thanks Chopper," Jessica told him._

_"Zoro, you can carry her to the Going Merry," Luffy told his first mate. "And you can put her in the girl's room where the girls will stay,"_

_"WE'RE NOT JOINING YOUR CREW DAMNIT!" My class and I shouted at the same time._

_He really is as persistent as he is in the manga._

_"Give it up, guys. Luffy kept asking us until we joined," Nami told us, "Even though I hated pirates, he still made me join even before he knew I could be a navigator," she continued._

_"I used to be a pirate hunter, but he kept bugging me so I joined," Zoro replied._

* * *

_Present_

"I guess it's not like we have much of a choice guys," Bri said as she turned to Luffy, "looks like we're joining your crew"

"YOSH!" Luffy yelled out in excitment.

"I swear, this guy is retard." David said as he shook his head. (Me: I apologize for the use of that word. I hate typing it out even beacause I know someone who is like that. It's just the way the real David acts like in reality. Sorry!) Ana kicked David in the shins while Gabbie, Ashley, Jessica, Bri, and I took turns slapping him.

"What the hell was that for?"

"For being born!" Ana responded. Jessica glared at the Mexican while Ashley nodded and said,

"And for saying that! You know that Mrs. Kirk hates it when people say stuff like that!"

"But she's not here!"

"SHE'S HERE IN HER SPIRIT FORM! SHE'S ALWAYS HERE! SHE'S OUT TA GET ME I TELLS YA!"

"...you forgot to take your pills again, didn't you Zoey?" Brian asked with a sigh.

"Do you guys act like this all the time?" Nami asked with a sweatdrop.

"Nami, you better get used to this, 'cause it's gonna get worse." Pete told her while Chip 'eek'ed in agreement.

"How so Shadow-san?" Robin asked.

_Sweet! She's gonna give us nick-names!_ "Trust me when I say it Robin, you don't wanna see us without our medicine and sugar-high." Maggie told her. I then got one of my famous impulses. I poked Rick-James and when I poked him, I let out a noise that sounded like the most annoying sound on Earth from the Dumb and Dumber movie. When I took my finger off him, I stopped. Everyone just stared at me.

"Yeah, see, that kinda shit is what happens." T.J. said while shaking his head. Everyone on the Straw-Hat pirate crew, save Luffy and Robin, looked a bit scared. Luffy just laughed.

"You guys are funny! C'mon, let's go to our ship!" My eyes got wide.

* * *

"Damnit Luffy! You should've told us the boat was tiny! How are we gonna fit?!" Gabbie demanded from her new captain. Luffy just smiled again. 

"I didn't know you had a potty mouth Gabbie." Grant said.

"Relax Gabbie. Just be glad. It could be worse. Like when my mom was a kid, she had twenty-six cousins who came to visit at their Grandpa's small one-floor beach house with their parents. We can do what they just about did: Grab a blanket and pillow and find a place to sleep." I told her.

"Didn't they wake up one morning and people were asleep on the kitchen counter and in the bathtub?" Pete asked.

"That's because it was one of her cousins who went out partying with some friends. They all came back and were too stone drunk to know the difference between the floor and a kitchen counter. As for the bathtub thing, I dunno, maybe they didn't want to be stepped on while they were sleeping." I pointed out.

"Just make sure to find a place to sleep inside. The Grandline has unpredictable weather. The last thing we need is one of you guys being washed overboard and drowning." Ussop advised.

"Val should stay in the medical room." Chopper told us.

"Ok, boys get the anchor room while girls get the storage room." Nami declared.

"But the anchor room is so small!" Al complained. I mentally agreed, after seeing it on the tour of the boat.

"Relax Al, we can fit you in any sort of tight spaces." Maggie joked.

"Just don't touch anything that has to do with the cannons." Nami told us.

* * *

After that chaos, we all found ways to entertain ourselves. It's never a good thing when A.D.H.D. kids are bored. Wanna know how you can tell that we are A.D.H.D? We can be occupied by a clicking pen and a bottle cap that clicks. I am one of those types of people sadly. 

I opened my bottomless backpack and pulled out a random book. This one was by James Patterson. As scary as it is, I don't just read manga, I read horror/murder/mystery. This 'scary' one is called Roses are Red. Even though it's 378 pages, I'll have it done in an hour, two hours tops. Yeah, I'm a speed reader. But I understand what I read, no matter how fast. Having A.D.H.D has its good sides to it. Too bad I've already read this book. I sighed and put the book down only to see that Robin had taken a seat next to me on deck.

"Reader-san, do you wish to read something else?" She asked me.

_Reader-san? Couldn't it be anything better?_ "That would be nice Robin. Do you have any murder mysteries that I could read?" I asked the oldest (and most sane) one of us. She shook her head.

"I'm sorry Reader-san. As you know, I am a historian. All I have are history books."

"I like history. It's like one big story and I like telling stories to my youngest sister."

"How many siblings to you have? When you were talking about you Mother and her cousins, it sounds like you have a big family." She said with a hint of sadness in her voice. I wonder why. I don't have the One Piece manga about Robins past, and I don't spoil it by watching the uncut subbed versions on YouTube before I read the manga.

"I do have a big family Robin-sempai. My mom's mom, my grandma, was one of thirteen. My dad's dad, my papa, was one of six. I have three cousins, two step-cousins, too many second-cousins to count, and don't get me started on third-cousins. Whenever we need to do a project in school about our family history, I have no hope at all. Not to mention, I'm European mutt." I explained to her. She then asked,

"What's European?"

"Oh, it's a different continent that have a lot of different languages and countries in it. My mom's side of the family is from France, Poland, Ireland, and Germany. My dad's side is from Italy and Ireland.

"It must be hard to find some alone time." She said with a small smile.

"Not really. About six years ago, my dad got a job transfer, so we had ta move to the south. We're the only ones in my family who live their." I told her as I got out a map of the U.S. I pointed at my old homestate and then pointed to my new state.

"That must have been hard for you Reader-san."

"It was. My youngest sister, Annie, wasn't born yet. I was ten, and my middle sister, Katie, was eight."

"What about your classmates? What are their stories?" Robin asked. I smiled and replied with,

"You've asked the right person Robin-sempai. I know everyone like the back of my hand. Who do you want to know about first?" She thought for a second and replied with, "How about Water-san." I assumed that ment Rick-James, so I told her.

"Rick-James was adopted. His birth mom was around eighteen when he was born, a few years after his half-brother. According to him, his birth dad is a carnie. But he's lived in our city his whole life, so there's not much else besides that. Who's next?"

"ZOEY! You better not be telling her about our entire history!" Fort Knox complained.

"I'm doin' nuttin' busta! You wanna make somethin' of it bub?!" I shouted at him with my Northern accent slipping out.

"OI! Zoey! Your friends say that you can sing! Sing for us!" Luffy shouted from his dubbed 'seat' on the figure head. I glared at my friends and they his. The rest of the guys held their ears in pain, moaning, "No! Don't let her sing!" Knowing Luffy, he won't stop bugging me about this until I agree. I sighed and took out my portable battery-charged iBoom with my iPod.

"Fine, but I pick the song and if you guys gotta problem, tough." I said, refering to my male classmates. I picked a song, took the lyrics out, and started to sing.

**_"Now I will tell you what I've done for you-  
Fifty thousand tears I've cried,  
Screaming, deceiving for you.  
And you still won't hear me (going under)  
Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself.  
Maybe I'll wake up for once. (wake up for once)  
Not tormented daily deffeated by you,  
Just when I thought I'd reach the bottom._**

**_I'm dying again,_**

**_I'm going under! (going under)  
Drowning in you! (drowing in you)  
I'm falling forever! (falling forever)  
I've got to break through!  
I'm going under!_**

**_Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies,  
(So I don't know what's real)  
So I don't know what's real and what's not. (what's not  
Always confusing the thoughts in my head,  
So I trust myself anymore._**

**_I'm dying again,_**

**_I'm going under! (going under)  
Drowning in you! (drowing in you)  
I'm falling forever! (falling forever)  
I've got to break through!_**

**_I'm..._**

**_So go on and scream  
Scream at me I'm so far away. (so far away)  
I won't be broken again! (again)  
I've got to breathe - I can't keep going under!_**

**_I'm dying again!_**

**_I'm going under! (going under)  
Drowning in you! (drowing in you)  
I'm falling forever! (falling forever)  
I've got to break through!_**

**_I'm going under! (going under)  
I'm going under! (drowning in you)  
I'm going under!"_**

After that song, I sang a few more, the ship almost got blown up by Rick-James and some other guys, dinner was served, a battle royal started between my class and Luffy for food, a fight between Sanji and Zoro, the boys trying to wash dishes (and broke the dishes, which made them all get kicked senseless by Sanji as we all watched in enjoyment), more chaos, half of us getting sugar high and annoying the hell out of those who weren't, another explosion, and something that cannot be written down. I will tell you it invovled life-sized voodo dolls, weseals, toothbrushes, and pudding. Yes, pudding. Lots and lots of pudding. I like pudding. Mmmmm...pudding...

Of course it was only after all of this that we started to get tired (keyword being started here people). See, most of us, me included, are insomniacs or have sleeping disorders. We can get two hours of sleep and still feel well-rested the next morning. Yep, that'll come in handy with college. I mean, a cup of coffee at Starbucks is like three bucks each. You get about one coffee a day. Three times seven is twenty-one dollars! Tat right there is a college feast!

Meanwhile, the Straw-Hats, even Luffy, were dead tired.

"We really need a bigger boat. With a place to lock you all up and throw away the key." Nami panted out.

"No way are we getting rid of the Merry!" Ussop managed to protest.

"Ussop, the Merry is in bad condition, you know that. You really need to move on. Maybe onto a boat with a lock on the fridge." Sanji said as he halfheartly kicked a snoring Zoro.

"NO! Merry was a gift from Kaya-chan! I'll never let her go!" A frying pan hit Ussop in the head with a voice saying,

"Can ya'll shut up? We're tryin' ta sleep."

"SHUT UP FORT KNOX! DO YOU WANT ME TO BLOW YOUR EARDRUMS OUT?!"

"Both of ya'll shut up 'fore I go ninja all over ya'lls asses!"

"You don't even punch hard Chuck."

"Not at home, but I sure can now Randy. 'Sides, all you can do is turn into metal. What kinda power is that?"

"SHUT THE HELL UP ALL OF YOU! US GIRLS NEED OUR SLEEP! REMEMBER, 'HELL HAST KNOWN NO FURY LIKE A GROUP OF PROVIDENCE GIRLS WITHOUT ANY SLEEP!'"

"That's not how it goes Bri."

"Hey, Chip an' I are tryin' ta sleep!"

"Oo eek eek!"

"Somebody shut that damn monkey up before he becomes breakfast!"

"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE MY MONKEY ALIVE RICK-JAMES!"

"This is going to be a long night, right Navigator-san." Robin said with a half smile. Nami just looked at her with a look that could kill the first one of us who made a sound. This went on for about three more hours until we all fell asleep.


	4. We're gonna bring sexy back!

My Class Meets One Piece Chapter 4:

We're gonna bring sexy back!

* * *

"Oh this is great. She'll never know that it was coming!" I heard a familiar voice say in my sleep. It came from above me, and it was someone I didn't want to hear this early in the morning. It was Rick-James. 

"Dude, you do know that she's gonna kill you when she wakes up and finds out you poured syrup in her hair." I heard Grant say,

"Remember the time you accused her of getting it on with her cousin? I made a joke about it the next day and she kicke the shit outta me. I still have a dent in my shin, and that was two months ago!" A voice, Bobby-Joe's, said to my right,

"Good point, but I'm gonna enjoy seeing her all upset about her hair." Rick-James replied,

_Rick-James, you die at sundown._ I felt something disrupting the space above me, and I grabbed it with my eyes still shut and held on as tight as I could. From what it felt like, it was boney with some muscle. Probably an arm.

"SHIT! She's up! Run for your lives!" I heard Bobby-Joe say as he and some others ran away. I opened my eyes to see Rick-James above me with a bottle of syrup ready to pour on my head.

"H-h-hi Zoey." He stumbled out.

"Did you really think I wouldn't hear you Rick-James? You're the loudest boy in school. And don't you dare think that I forgot about you thinking I got it on with my cousin. And goddamnit, he's five years younger than me!"

Well, long story short, in Civics we were talking about laws that used to be illegal, and abortion was brought up. Someone, Pete to be exact, asked why anyone would have an abortion. My teacher said that it could be because of rape or incest. She asked if anyone knew what it was. Since I read fanfics online all the time, (incest not included. I found out the hard way was that was) I was the only one who knew what it was. So she made me tell everyone about it. They asked how I knew and I gave them the honest answer. Rick-James didn't listen to me and came to the conclusion that I got it going on with my cousin who hasn't even reached puberty yet, who lives on the opposite side of the country. He told all the guys in our grade. I got special permision from the principal to beat each and anyone of them who brought it up. I had a lot of fun beating Rick-James senseless with my biggest text book. Bobby-Joe was the next victim, who even though he ran as fast as hell, still didn't escape me and my 'Kick of Death'. I hope they both have dents on their bodies for as long as they live and that they never have kids.

After all, the last ting we want are a bunch of little Rick-James' running around the world causing chaos. If you ask me, I think I did a favor to the world.

"Rick-James, by the time I'm done with you, you'll be nothing but a spot of blood on the floor." I said in a scary voice as I pulled out my math text book, "Now then, DIE RICK-JAMES!" I shouted as I tried to hit him. He dodged and started to run around the boat. I followed with a killing intent surounding me. Nami came out of the cabin only to see Rick-James and I fighting. She sighed and said as she rubbed her temples with her fingers,

"I really should have stayed in bed today..."

"Oi, Sanji, I'm hungry. Make me some meat!" Luffy ordered as he sat on his special seat at the front of the ship.

"We're outta food Luffy. Someone's gonna hafta go fishing!" Sanji said from inside the kitchen.

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE BY STARVATION!" Al concluded. He's got a habbit of jumping to conclusions. He seems to not get the fact that assuming makes an ass out of you and me.

Well, with Al anouncing that we were all gonna die, anyone with only half a mind started to panic by running around in circles like headless chickens. Nami stopped the commotion by yelling, 'SHUT UP!' and threatend us by tossing us overboard. When everyone was calmed down, I started to kill Rick-James again while she said,

"Ok, there's an island up ahead, but we'll probably make it by noon. If any of you want food, start fishing." Chopper then made himself known by saying,

"Val's doing fine, she should be able to walk by next week."

"Be able to walk by next? Yeah right, try today!" A familiar voice said. Standing in the doorway of the cabin, was Val, with her bandages off with no scar at all.

"Val-san is ok!" Sanji rejoiced.

"Welcome back to the world of the living Val!" Gabbie said as she hugged Val.

"I'll never get used to your insanely fast healing rate." Jessica said as she joined in with Gabbie with hugging Val.

"You're just in time to witness Zoey murder Rick-James for the eleventh time this month." Brian said casually.

"What did you do this time Rick-James?" Val asked in a halfhearted tone. There was no answer, just him screaming bloody muder. She listened to him screaming before asking, "So you tried to pour syrup into her hair while she was asleep only she woke up?"

"How'd you figure that out? He didn't do nothin' but scream his voice box out."

"Deductive reasoning my dear Al."

"Anyway, when we're on the island, as much as it pains me to say this, we need to get a new boat. The bad news is is that we barelly have enough money to afford a row boat." Nami continued. Ussop hugged one of the ship's railings and said,

"We're never gonna replace the Merry! She was a gift from Kaya-chan!"

"Who's Kaya-chan, your girlfriend? Hey, what kind of name is 'Kaya-chan' anyway?" David asked in an annoying voice. Ussop blushed as he yelled,

"Her name's Kaya! And s-she's not my girlfriend, she's just a friend!"

"She might as well be. When Kaya got sick after her parents died, everyday he would sneak into her property and tell her stories to make her feel better." I explained as I continued to turn Rick-James into a pile of mush. Ussop had a shocked expression on his face.

"I know all about you guys, except Robin. Don't test me and my knowledge that I can blackmail you with."

"Ussop, we can still keep the Merry as a second boat that's tied up with this boat." Sanji said as he tried to pull the sharp-shooter off the railing. The long-nosed sniper let go, sending the two of them flying into a wall.

"I think that sounds like a good idea." Robin said as she looked up from my book, _Roses are Red_. I lent it to her last night and she told me that she was really enjoying it even though I had to tell her all about cars, computers and stuff like that.

"But the real problem is how we're gonna get the money when we still need food and new clothes for you all. I mean, lets face it, you all look out of place. I could lend some of my money to you..." Nami said with a sly look on her face. Zoro woke up from his nap just to warn us,

"Don't borrow money from Nami. She'll make you pay her back with three hundred percent intrest!"

"Speaking of which, Zoro you still owe me money from your new swords."

"Lay off it woman!"

"Don't you dare talk to Nami-san like that you shitty-marimo!"

"No one asked you love cook!"

"You wanna fight?"

"It's on!" _YOSH! I get to see one of the Zoro vs. Sanji fights in real life! Kilnorc, Super Nanny and DJ Paynter will never believe this! I'd better get my cellphone out and record this for evidence!_ While I was recording the fight on my cellphone to post online when we got home, an idea introduced itself by smacking Bri in the head with a mallet.

"I know how we can raise enough money!" she announced.

"How?!" Nami asked with Beli signs in her eyes.

"Hey ya'll, it looks like we're gonna hafta re-enact the School Concert of Spring '06. It's time ta bring sexy back!" Everyone in my class cheered, while the Straw-Hat pirates looked confused.

"What's a concert?" Luffy asked.

"A concert is when a bunch of bands come together to play their music for people Captain-san. Reader-san told me all about the things that they have in their world." Robin explained.

"MELLORINE! Bri-chan and Robin-chwan are so smart!" Sanji said as he twirled around on hearts.

"So what's the plan?" Zoro asked. All of us girls got an evil look in our eyes as we looked at Luffy, Sanji, and Zoro.

"Boys, get Zoro, Luffy, and Sanji ready to bring sexy back. We'll take care of Nami and Robin. GET 'EM!" Ashely ordered as the dressing began. Let's just say that when we were done with all of them, they could make anyone drool or faint from blood lose. The guys managed to get Zoro into green swim trunks with black sides, revieling his scar from his fight with Mihawk. Sanji had blue swimming trunks on with white sides. Luffy had red trunks on that had a blue stripe on each side. We managed to get Robin and Nami into their skimpiest swimsuits. By the time we were done, land was in sight. Needless to say, the guys and Sanji were drooling at the sight of Nami and Robin while some of the girls in my class (I won't lie, I was included) were drooling at the sight of Zoro, Sanji, and Luffy.

_I had no idea that Luffy had a six pack! Oh happy day! I must take pictures! And Zoro's so sexy with that scar! But Sanji-hentai is real pale and scrawny. Well, that's what he gets for always wears that suit._

"Ok, here's the plan: ya'll stay here until we come back with swimsuits and clothes. Then, Ashley will make a stage and Zoey will pull out a stereo and a turn-table from her backpack. Then, we bring teh sexy back!" Val told all of us. I stepped foward and said,

"Val, more people are gonna be out at nighttime, we should wait until then. You guys can put clothes over your swimsuits for now."

"Good idea. You guys can go and do what you want, just meet us at..." Nami looked at the docking site to look for a place to meet, "how about that place right there!" She said as she pointed to a resturaunt that probably go down into the basement for the sitting area.

"Looks good. Lets dock this ship and explore!" Luffy announced.

* * *

Later

* * *

"I'm not wearing it!" I shouted at all of the girls in my class from inside the dressing room. 

"C'mon Zoey. It's not that bad!" Anna comforted. I poked my head from inside with my arms covering my torso and said,

"It's a skirt. I'm fine with it as long as I can put shorts under them. But this one is PINK and it's a mini skirt. You guys know I hate pink. And the last thing I want is Sanji-hentai flirting with me. Jeez, I hate that guy and his perverted ways sometimes..."

"But you look great in it!" Gabbie said as she tried to hand me a pink shirt with red hearts all over it.

"NEVER! I HATE PINK!" I shouted as I tossed the skirt to them and it landed on Maggie's head. I came out in my normal attire (Fadded jeans, converse black sneakers and a purple t-shirt) and walked to a rack.

"These are my kind of clothes. Easy to move in, comfy, non-prep, with a heck of a lotta pockets." I said as I held up a pair of tan cargos.

"NO! You need something nice and frilly!" Val declared.

"NEVER!" I said as I grabbed some clothes that I liked and ran out. "COMFORT IS THE ONLY WAY TO GO!

"Hey, get back here!" The manager shouted as he tried to follow me. Ashley sighed as Val stuck out her foot, tripping the manager as I made my escape.

"Can't she go one day without going crazy?" Jessica asked. Bri put her arm around the new student's shoulders and said,

"Poor naive Jessica. You haven't even seen her get to the top level of crazy yet."

"She can get crazier?"

"Not as nuts as Rick-James though..."

"Thank God for that..."

After tracking me down, we all went to the meeting spot, an underground resturaunt that was full of pirates. Much to our suprise, everyone was already there and pigging out as Nami was crying over the loss of her much-loved money. We grabbed some seats and sat down.

"How are we gonna get a new boat at this rate? Just about all our money goes to feeding everyone." Nami complained.

"Oi! As your captain, I demand that we stop spending so much money." Luffy said as he stuffed some more meat into his mouth.

"Hey! Give it back Luffy! I had it first!" Fort Knox said as he tried to get back a drumstick that Luffy grabbed. Luffy just streatched his neck and ate the drumstick. Fort Knox started to cry over the loss of his beloved food, but got over it when he saw another drumstick.

"MOST OF THE MONEY IS BUYING FOOD FOR YOU!" Everyone shouted at Luffy. Robin must have seen something because she said,

"Navigator-san, maybe you could ask the bartender if there is a way to earm more money around here. I looked at the bartender. Not much of a guy, he looked like all the other bartenders that I've seen. Nami got up and talked to him for a while before walking away with a smile.

"Ok guys, follow me. I found a way to make more money!" Al paled at hearing this and moaned,

"Oh boy, no good can come from this at all ya'll."


	5. Southerners love racing!

Chapter 7: Southerner's love racing!

* * *

After hearing the news that Nami found a way to raise money, all T.J. had to say was: 

"Sweet! We might not hafta embarass ourselves again!" To which Val responded with a smile,

"Puh-lease T.J. You know you loved gettin' up on stage and shakin' yo thang!" We all stood up and followed the bartender who led us to a secret door. He opened the door and led us inside to a place with no lights.

"Hey, i-is this where you kill us with an axe or a chainsaw?" Grant asked. I mentally agreed. Hey, it seemed familiar from a horror movie I saw. Guy brings people into room, guy comes out alone with blood all over him. The bartender just laughed and said,

"Why would I want to do that? Now hurry inside and shut the door behind you." _Omigoshhe'sgonnakillusisn'the? I don't wanna die! There are too many things for me to do! I need to see next week's episodes of CSI and Heroes! I need to tell kilnorc about Dusty's past! I need to read his next chapter! I need to update my fanfictions! I'm too young to die Lord!_

"I take is that this is a bad time to say that I hate the dark." Fort Knox mumbled to himself. The bartender just rolled his eyes and lit a lantern and handed it to Zoro. With the light we could clearly see that we were in a tunnel.

"Echo!" Rick-James shouted only to hear his voice echo back multiple times.

"Hey, it's pitch black here. Can we get another light?" Ussop asked nervously.

"Just keep walking straight ahead. You'll get where you want to go from there." the tall man explained.

"Sugoi! This is gonna be fun!" Luffy shouted with excietment in his voice.

"Hey ya'll, I found my lighter!" Chuck announced as he light the small handheld lighter.

"Oh yeah, that's really gonna help us Chuck. We can't even see our hands infront of our faces with that damn thing." David complained.

"How'd ja get it past the museum security?" Jessica asked quietly. Chuck got a shifty look in his eyes.

"That's for me to know and you to never find out."

"In other words, he has weapons of mass destruction somewhere beneath his clothes and plans to kill us all." Grant said sarcasitcally. Chopper looked scared and quickly hid behind Zoro. It took about five minutes to convince the poor thing that Grant was just being sarcastic.

"Hey wait a minute! You haven't told us anything about how we get the money at all!" Nami accused. "She's right!" Ussop added.

"This is as far as I can go. You'll understand when you get there." The man stated bluntly.

"So we found a way to make money, only we don't know HOW to make the money...ow, my head hurts." Randy said as he rubbed his head.

"Ok then, lets go!" Luffy said with a smile only to be tackled by Ussop and Al.

"Dumbass! You're gonna trust this guy?! For all we know he's a part of the Navy or police who wants to kill us all!" Al stated.

"Yeah! This is way to convinient, it's gotta be a trap!" Ussop agreed.

"If you don't want to go, then just quit. At least this way I can sleep easier tonight." The bartender said.

"Sorry, but none of us quit when somethin's this excietin'." Bobby-Joe told him.

"Except with Pete and his puppy...poor thing never had a chance." Bri said sadly.

"I had a puppy?" Pete asked.

"I seem to recall last month where you came dancing to school chanting, 'I gotta puppy! I got my own puppy!'" Ana recalled.

"I dunno about you, but I'm going! This smells like a big adventure!" Luffy stated with that weird smile of his stuck to his face.

"Now you're sure that we can make some money here, right?" Nami asked again.

"If my sweet Nami-san wants her money, then we shall get it!" Sanji said as his eye turned into a heart.

"For some reason, Sanji reminds me of Ernest Hemingway..." Maggie said.

"Who was that?" Chopper asked as he tucked at the hem of her jeans.

"He was a famous author where we're from who had four wives; all of which he cheated on." Gabbie explained. The bartender coughed, making us pay attention to him again.

"As for the money, I don't lie, but I can't tell you the details." The bartender let out a sigh. Ussop curled into a ball and said while shivering,

"My chronic 'I-shouldn't-go-through-this-tunnel' disease is acting up again."

"Liar." everyone in my class said. Zoro put his hand on the liar's shouler and said,

"Give it up Ussop, Luffy already made up his mind to go."

"And don't forget that we need the money for a new boat. What choice do we have?" Sanji added.

"I've got a bad feeling about this..." Ussop and Al complained.

"Don't be such a wimp ya'll." Brian said.

"Luffy, is an adventure waiting for us up ahead?" Chopper asked with stars for eyes.

"Yeah!"

"Yosh!" Chopper said with sparkles around him.

"Let's go! To get my food money!" Luffy shouted.

"IS THAT ALL YOU CARE ABOUT?!" Everyone, except Robin, asked Luffy.

"Just show two 100 beli coins at the end. That's the password." the man told Nami. _Geez, that's kinda lame. It should be something like, 'The raven flies at midnight' or something like that..._

"Thanks a lot old man!" Luffy said before he began to lead us into the tunnel with Zoro holding the lantern next to him.

"Hey kid, can I ask you something?" The bartender asked.

"Can we hurry this us? It's moist in here and my hair's starting to frizz." Ashley complained. Some other girls nodded, but I didn't. I hate having my hair. It's always so flat and stringy and if I don't wash it every day i gets greasy. It's because of those things that I don't have a clue to how I'm gonna do my hair for the prom since I can't let it grow longer than my shoulders or it'll get even greasier. Don't question me, I've tried.

"I'll make it quick. Kid, why did you become a pirate?" He asked our captain. Luffy looked at the man and answered with a smile,

"To be the Pirate King. Besides, the sea is nice and free, right? Treasure hunting and adventures...besides, there's tons of cool stuff to do!"

"I have some advice for you: Stay alive." The bartender advised.

"Hey, c'mon Luffy! We can't be waitin' here for you forever!" T.J. said, who was slapped by Val.

"Be quiet midget!" As Zoro led us on, our eyes adjusted to the darkness. Al and Ussop were scared out of their witts while the rest of us walked on like walking through dark and creepy tunnels of doom were daily things. Actually, that is a daily thing, going to school with Rick-James, Bobby-Joe, David, Pete, and T.J. is hazardous to our health. Zoro seemed to make a face light he was squinting at something.

"What's wrong?" Sanji asked. Zoro turned his head so he could look at Sanji and answered,

"Eh, It's nothing." He turned his head to look hin front of him, only to come face-to-face with a glowing skeleton head. He, Ussop, Al, Nami, Chopper and all the girls and guys in my class (except me, I watch CSI and scary movies all the time making me immune to all the scary things in life except death) yelled in fear. Zoro tossed the lantern in the air and managed to catch it. Only, he was holding on to the glass part of the lantern. He shouted, 'OUCH', from the heat, tossed it into the air again, and fell down. Acting quickly, Sanji caught the lantern handle with his foot.

"Ohmygod. I thought that there was some serial killer or somethin'." Bri sighed out. Rick-James's eyes rolled to the back of his head and fainted. To tell you the truth, I think there was some foam at the side of his mouh.

"Oi Zoro! What are you trying to...oh?" Sanji scolded before we all noticed that there was a man standing in front of a door. Turns out, the skelenton head was his face luminated by his own lantern in his hand.

"Who the hell are you?" T.J. asked. All the girls in my class tackled him and shouted,

"DON'T ASK SOME SCARY-LOOKING GUY THAT!"

"Hang on Sanji..." Nami said before any of us could beat someone up. She walked forward and said while stepping over Zoro, "Zoro you're in the way. But there's no need to worry sir. We've got the password right here." She flashed two 100 beli coins in front of him. The man grunted and opened the door that he was guarding. Chuck grabbed Rick-James, who was still kocked out, by both his ankles and dragged him in while we walked inside. Our eyes widened and we all gasped at what we saw.

Inside was a HUGE room that was filled with pirates eating, drinking, and all kinds of stuff. Not only was it a room, but it had dozens of floors, each one with pirate flags hanging over the railing. At the bottom was a pool of water where two giants were drinking together. At the top was a boat hanging on a pulley. Luffy, Chopper, and Ussop were the most excited out of all of us.

"I changed my mind about this world. I've died and gone to heaven." Pete said with wide eyes as he eyeballed the dessert table. Chip 'eek'ed in agreement.

"Dibs on the beer!" Most of my male classmates shouted. Hearing the word, 'beer' somehow revived Rick-James from his unconscious state.

"What is this place?" Ussop asked in amazement. Zoro walked up behind us, finally after getting up saying, "Man that thing was damn hot."

"There were only a few ships in the port when we got here." Nami thought aloud. A perverted voice asked us,

"Hey cuties! Did ja come here ta bet? The bookmarker's on the top floor." We looked at the owner of the voice, who was playing poker. _Dear Lord in heaven, not another pervert. Jeez, I really do hate them...Too many bad experiences with them to last a lifetime..._

"Bookmarker?" Everyone asked.

"Don't tell me that you're here ta enter the race?" The man asked in disbelief.

"The race?" Nami asked.

"Are you kidding? Southerner's love racing! We're even from the home city of NASCAR (1)" Bobby-Joe shouted as he punched his fist in the air.

"All you see are ca-I mean boats sailing around a circle as fast as they can go. Nothing is exciting about that." I told him dully.

"Don't even think about entering the race! You'll just be wasting your lives away." he told us as he returned to his game.

"Ah, so this is the place. It's been a while, so I didn't remember it at first." Robin said.

_Of course Robin knows about this... _"Robin-chwan is so smart!" Sanji said while flying on hearts.

"So what is this place? Make the answer snappy 'cause I want beer!" David asked annoyingly.

"I was once here with the captain of the pirate ship that I boarded. It's not an anually even, but it's a big race held here once every few years."

"RACING!"

THWAP!

"SHUT UP! LET ROBIN TALK!" I shouted at the now bruised Bobby-Joe. While he rubbed his shin in pain, Robin continuted,

"It's the organized by pirates, for pirates, anything-goes Dead End Race. All of the citizens of the town were at one point pirates. The end is different every time, but the starting point is always here. Competitors sail there by using Eternal Poses given to them when they enter."

"What are the rules?" Val asked.

"I was getting there Fire-san. Whoever reaches the goal first wins. The winner recieves the prize. Whatever happens durring the race is your problem." Robin answered. Sanji lit another ciggarette as Zoro said,

"Sounds easy enough."

"It's about as simple as figuring out what's going to happen next." Sanji said as he took a puff from the poison on a stick.

"I dunno guys... this race has some weird bad mojo vide to it." Brian said.

"Yeah, I mean, it sounds too easy. There's gotta be something else behind it that we don't know about." Bri said as she rubbed her chin and her eyes moved to the upper right of her view, indicating that she was in deep thought. Fort Knox interrupted her thinking by saying,

"You think too much Bri."

"Yeah, it sounds too dangerous. On the other hand, it might not be so bad with a crew like ours. And it looks like Luffy's ready to join." Nami replied as she looked at the strange crew, "Hey, who else is entering the race?" she asked the guy from before.

"You kids really are gonna enter? Well, my guess is that about a third of the people here are entering."

"Wow...that's a lot of people." Ussop, Luffy, Al, Chopper, Rick-James, and Randy said at the same time.

"The two giants at the bottom are Bobby and Pogo. They're the third favorites." The man explained. _One their names is Pogo? Like a Pogo Stick? Something is deffinetly wrong right there. Wonder what his mom was thinking when she named him..._

"So there're giants entering!" Ussop said with a smile. I knew he was probably remembering the two giants he admired on Little Garden.

"I didn't think that giants exsisted." Jessica said as she peered over the railing.

"Then again, with such things as Devil Fruits and the shit that happens to us everyday, it's hard not to belive." Fort Knox told her.

"On the terrance in front of us is an old rival of Arlong, Grampus Mermaid Willy. He's the second favorite." The man continued. We looked ahead of us to see a large group of fishmen drinking grog.

"Even a merman!" Nami said with a fake smile on her face and her eye started to twitch rapidly. Everyone in my class looked confused, but I understood. Nami had a bad past involving a merman who killed her foster mom while the same merman forced her to work for him until she got 100 million beli to buy her villiage back.

_I'll fill them in later..._ "An old rivial of Arlong's?" Ussop asked with a fake smile also on his face. Nami ran towards Luffy, who was skipping (yes, skipping) in joy with Chopper in his arms, and grabbed his ear while saying,

"Hang on Luffy! We haven't even decided if we're entering in the race yet! Besides, there's no point in taking part in a crazy thing like this!"

"How much is the prize?" Robin asked the man.

"I think it's 300,000,000 beli this year." he replied. Nami let go of Luffy's ear and declared,

"We are entering in the race!"

"AYE!"

While Nami signed us up, Zoro, Luffy, Ussop, Chopper, Rick-James, Bobby-Joe, Pete, Brian, Chuck, Gabbie, Bri, Ana, Val, and I went and found a table to eat at. Luffy might has well have been inhaling all the food in his sight. All the rest of us had forks and knives ready to stab his hands if they tried to steal our food. The guys in my class, along with Zoro, were getting drunk.

"Are ya'll sure you should be drinkin' like that? Ya'll are underage." Val pointed out as she slurrped some spaghetti.

"We're fine Val." Pete said as he put down his first bottle of beer down.

"Hey Luffy, weren't you full earlier?" Zoro asked.

"Nope! That was only around 60 percent full!" We all rolled our eyes and continued eating. I personally put my knife into the rare steak I'd recieved when I saw Luffy strech his arms and grabbed the food a waiter was trying to keep away from another man with a yellow sweater on. The man who was eating swallowed and glared at Luffy, who continued to stuff his face.

"Zoey, wasn't there a CSI episode where a guy died by eating ta death?" Gabbie asked. I nodded and recalled,

"It was the Thanksgiving episode of '06. A man was found in a dumpster with a smile on his face. COD (cause of death) was because the guy ate so much that his stomach was six liters in volume; the maximum of liters is four. He died from asphyxia, or suffocation. The guy litterally ate himself to death. He didn't stop eating beause he had a disorder that didn't send a signal from the stomach to the brain saying that it was full. Who knew?"

"Did we need ta hear that?" Ana said as my friends pushed their plates away. Luffy grabbed some more food from waiters and swallowed them.

"I swear dude, you're a living vacum cleaner." Chuck declared.

"What's a vacum cleaner?" Chopper asked. Before any of us could answer, Ussop said,

"It's a giant monster that eats everything in sight. It's bigger than a Sea King!"

"REALLY?!"

"Of course. I fought and killed one when I was only a year old!"

"USSOP YOU'RE-" Chopper started, but we all said,

"Such a liar."

"Don't listen to him Chopper. A vacum cleaner is a device from our world that is used for cleaning houses. It literally sucks all the dust away." Gabbie reassured the reigndeer.

"Hey, if a vacum cleaner sucks, is that a bad thing?" Pete asked.

"Gah! The retorical questions have returned to confuse me yet again!" Val shoutd as she cluctched her head. Suddenly, there was a loud 'CRASH!'

_Goddamnit Luffy! What the hell did you do now?_

_

* * *

_

**(1) Well, that should tell you where we're from. But I moved in August, so can't find me! But the good part of living there was that at the local hospital, they filmed the hospital scene from Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby there! One of my mom's friends was there for a check up and she saw Will Ferrell walking down the hall. When asked what he was doing there, he just said, "Oh, we're just filming a movie scene here." XD How awesome is that?!**


	6. BOOM SHAKA LAKA LAKA!

Chapter 8: BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA-LAKA!

**_

* * *

_**

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Everyone who was in my class at the table shouted, save Bri and Gabbie. A man with a yellow sweat-shirt had punched Luffy's head into the table, cracking the wooden object in half. Needless to say, Ussop and Chopper were to scared to move, although they were shaking like it was the middle of winter.

"Dude, you f--king spilled my beer! Val, hold me back! Hold me back!" Rick-James ordered. Val grabbed him by the arms, only to hear him now say, "Now lemme at him Lemme at him!" Lets just say Val didn't let him go.

_Geez, it's no wonder his first word was the f-bomb, he uses it at least twenty times a day!_ "What the hell was that for?!" Zoro asked, his hands placed on his three swords.

"What was that for? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT THAT WAS FOR!" The man shouted angrily.

"Sounds like someone needs ta take a chill pill." Gabbie whispered to Bri.

"SHUT UP! Just because he can stretch his arms doesn't mean...he can stretch his arms...arms can stretch...HANG ON, HE CAN STRETCH HIS ARMS?!" the man shouted with question in his voice.

"Little slow on the reaction there man." we all said. _Dude, even my seven year-old sister has faster reactions than that._ Luffy stood up from the crash with a 'Yosh' and stared at the strange man.

"And so the glaring contest begins." Brian said sarcastically.

"So you have the power of the Devil's Fruit?" The man asked our captain. Luffy had no chance to answer, because a rather large group of angry and hungry pirates had formed around us.

"Oi! That was our food! You don't have a right to eat it at all!" One of them with pink hair in a buzz cut said.

"Well it's ya'lls own fault that ya'll couldn't protect your own food." Bobby-Joe pointed out. _Why can't he keep his mouth shut?!_

Well, that made most of the other pirates angry and about three of the pirates aimed and fired their guns at our soccer fanatic redneck. But he used his new-found powers to escape all three of the bullets.

"He's a Devil Fruit eater, like Gasparde-sama!" one of them shouted. Another pirate closed his eyes and fired his gun randomly, hitting Luffy square on the head.

"LUFFY!" My classmates shouted. Well, everyone except Rick-James because he only cares about himself, and I because I know that he's OK.

"Don't worry about him guys. He'll be fine in about three...two...one...HIT THE DECK!" I counted down and ducked as the bulled ricocheted off of Luffy's rubber head and back towards us. I was the only smart person who ducked.

"OI! What's the big deal?! That scared me!" Luffy shouted as he pointed at the man who shot him.

"Normally when I shoot a guy it's supposed to do more than to scare them..." The guy managed to squeak out. Luffy shifted some rubble of the table over to find his hat and placed it on his head.

"What the hell are you?!" The man with pink hair asked.

"I ate the Gomu-Gomu no Mi as a kid. I'm a rubber man!" Luffy said as he pulled his arm far back and shouted, **"GOMU-GOMU NO...PISTOL!"** With that single punch, he took out about a dozen of the angry pirates.

"What's with ya'll naming' your attacks after weird shit?" Pete asked Zoro.

"I dunno. It sounds cooler I guess." the swordsman answered.

"Hey brat, do you even know who we are? We're Gasparde's crew." The pink-haired man said.

_Is it me or do most pirates here have bigger ego's than Kaiba from Yu-Gi-Oh?_

"Yeah, but ya'll shouldn't underestimate us either. We're Providence students who know how ta kick ya'lls asses." Brian said as he sprouted sharp bones from his body, making him look like a porcupine. He shot them off at the pirates, but let's just say that Brian doesn't have the best aim. _Guess he's not fully used to the Devil Fruit powers yet...But still! Not only have I witnessed a Zoro vs. Sanji fight, but now I get to fight with the Straw Hat pirates! At this point I don't care if I die when I get home cuz now I can go happily!_

"Nice move, whatcha gonna call it?" Pete asked as the pirates came at us. He tried to attack with his shadow by grabbing a pirate, but he accidentally grabbed Ussop with it and wound up using the poor guy as a shield, "My bad man!"

Brian dodged an oncoming pirate and said as he stabbed him with a bone,

"Maybe I'll call it...**ASSAULTING BONES**."

"Sounds good dude, but check this out, **PIERCING SHRIEK**!" I said as I attacked. I used my voice to shatter the eardrums of some of the pirates. I'm glad that I already normally use my voice to hurt people even before the Devil Fruits.

"That's nothing compared to this Yankee, **RUNNING TWISTER**!" Bobby-Joe said as he ran around a group of pirates so fast, that a tornado formed, sucking them up.

"Hey, where's Luffy?" Bri asked as she barely dodged a pirate with a rusty blood covered sword.

"I think he's..."

**"GOMU-GOMU NO...PISTOL!"**

"...yeah, he's right there." I said to my fellow Northerner, pointing in the direction of the shout, "When unsure where the baka rubber man is, just be quiet and you'll hear him soon."

Turns out, Luffy was fight the pirates side-by-side with the guy with the yellow sweatshirt. The man was using a sword until a pirate broke it, so he grabbed on to the chain on the pulley that kept the boat hanging from the ceiling up.

"C'mon ya'll, let's follow him!" Rick-James said as he turned from water into a normal human body.

_One has to wonder how he uses that to fight. Far as he knows, all he can do is turn into water. _One by one, we grabbed on to the chain. As we went up, we saw that we were being followed by the pirates.

"Hey look, it's the rest of the crew! HI YA'LL!" Ana shouted while waving with one hand to the rest of our crew. The other hand was drawing something while her feet were tightly wrapped around the moving chain and her knees were holding her drawing pad steady. Oh the joy of having A.D.H.D and being able to multi-task...

"Huh? What are you guys doing?" Nami asked.

"Nothing much." Chuck said casually.

"It's just a fight." Luffy, who was below the other pirates, said.

"Oh, OK. Don't get lost." Nami calmly said as she returned to drinking tea.

"Uh-oh, a dead end guys!" Gabbie said as we neared the top.

"Hey ya'll, I got an idea! Just grab on when ya see it!" Ana said as the picture she was drawing came to life. It was a giant, crudely made bird. I don't think any of us cared, cuz we all grabbed on to it, except Luffy. The poorly drawn bird carried us to the rest of our crew. Unfortunately, Ana's powers still aren't under full control, and the bird poofed away within thirty seconds. That being said, we fell onto the thing and/or person under us.

"Ya'll do know at other schools, they have normal days and students. They don't get sucked into a world of pirates and get freaky power by eating damn weird fruits." David said we landed on top of him.

"Yeah. But we're Providence students bitch!" Rick-James said as he sat on top of all of us.

"Maybe it's time that we should go and raise our boat money." Ashley said with an eyebrow raised.

"AW! Such a good idea from Ash-Chwan!" Sanji said.

"Fine, let's round up everyone else and set things up. Now where's Luffy..." Val asked as she accidentally set someone's pants on fire. I think it was that pink-haired pirate from before...

* * *

After rounding everyone up, we headed towards the boat to get dressed. But we were a good ten feet away from the Going Merry...when it blew up. Yes, our only ship blew up. 

I kid you nots.

Needless to say, everyone said at the same time,

"Shit."

"We need a new boat, and we need it **_NOW_**." I said. Ussop started crying instantly and moaning about how his present from Kaya-chan was gone. Everyone went to comfort him. Some of the original Straw Hat crew even started to cry. Heck, some of US started to cry. I mean, even though we only spent one night on that boat, it grew on us very fast. Bri went towards the water and used her wind powers to the best of her abilities to bring a floating board towards her. She grabbed it and gave it to Ussop, saying,

"I'm sorry Ussop, but this is all that I can get with my powers so far." Ussop sniffed a few times before taking the board. On it were the words, **_The Going Merry_**.

"T-t-thank you Bri." the marksman stuttered out as he grabbed the wood and hugged it tightly. Bri nodded to my classmates and I, and we stood up and started to walk away.

"Wind-san, could you please tell us where you all are going?" Robin asked. Bri turned her head to look at Robin and answered with a serious look on her face,

"We're gettin' money so that we can get a boat and win this race. After all, we're Providence students as well as members of the Straw Hat pirates; we don't let something like this block us. If ya'll wanna come, we'll be in front of the clock tower. Zoey's got your swimsuits in her bag. And don't worry about finding the guy who did this Ussop," Ussop looked up at her with a confused face. She continued, "Having A.D.H.D. and stuff like that lets us pay attention to the tiny details. Brian, T.J., an' Fort Knox are gonna find out who did this. And those people will have hell to pay for messing with our... What's that word for crew mate Zoey that you were talkin' bout a week ago?"

"Nakama."

"Right. They're gonna pay for messing with our nakama and their feelings. Lets go guys."

"RIGHT!"


	7. Dancing with the Providence Students! ?

My Class Meets One Piece 7: Dancing with the... Providence Students?!

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE: I WILL ONLY DO THE LYRICS OF THE SONGS THAT EVERYONE IS IN AND WILL DO IT IN SCRIPT FORM. I DO NOT OWN THESE SONGS OR ONE PIECE PEOPLE SO DON'T SUE ME!  
_****_

* * *

_**

"Hey guys, I just realized that I'm not gonna have a partner." I said as I pulled out a speaker from my bag. We were setting up the stage in the center of the town and everyone was working. As for my lack of partner, durring the Concert of '06, just about all of us had partners, except T.J. and Fort Knox, for our dances in the concert. Brian was my partner.

"Did you just notice that? And people say that I'm slow." David said as he picked up two of the heavy speakers and balanced them both on one hand.

"Maybe you could get Sanji or Zoro to be your partner Zoey." Ashley said as she used her poweres to make an uneven stage. Chuck and Al fixed that by using their knife and eye-beam powers to level it. Well, tried to would be more like it. It was still a bit lopsided, but hey, you try doing that with new powers!

"How exactly shall this work Wind-San?" Robin asked Bri as they hauled a generator out of sight to avoid people finding out about us.

"We just basically get on the stage, dance the routines according to the song while inbetween the songs we beg for money." Bri explained as Chopper took the generator from them while in his Heavy Point.

"I will happily be Z-chan's partner for this performance!" Sanji declared as he floated towards me on hearts. I shot him my famous glare and said,

"No way in heck are you gonna be my partner Sanji-hentai. But you can go and atract people over here with Val an' Ana." His eye turned into a heart as Ana and Val dragged him off.

"Now that that's taken care of...there's no way in hell I'ma gonna be Zoey's partner." Grant said as he pulgged in some plugs into the generator. All the guys in my class agreed.

_Memo to self: Hurt/stab/torture them/beat them when I have free time._ "I think Zoro would be the best choice for you Zoey." Jessica said quietly.

"Why me?!" Zoro asked as he looked up from trying to figure out how to work the generator...and failing. Bobby-Joe and Randy stopped him just in tie before he cut it in half with his swords.

"Because Luffy an' Ussop are klutzes, Chopper's a reindeer an' Sanji's a perv. Need I say more?" Bri said.

"I'll buy you sake if you do it Zoro..." Maggie bribed. While we were in the bar, we leared that no one could hold their drink longer than Zoro and Nami. Zoro's ears seemed to perk at the word 'sake' and said gruffly,

"Fine, but I won't like it."

"Good! Now, C'mon Zoro, you need ta learn the words and the dances that Brian would do. Lucky for you, I'm an expert at helping people cram information!" Bri said as she dragged Zoro into an alley way to force the info into his brain. After a half-hour, everything looked ready, so Jessica said to all of us,

"My guess is that ow would be a good time for this to start ya'll."

"HEY YA'LL! PEOPLE ARE COMIN' SO GET READY!" We heard Val shout as she, Ana, and Sanji ran towards us. They were in their performance outfits that they somehow got out of my bag.

"OK PEOPLE! IT'S TIME TA BRING DA SEXY BACK!" I looked over to the turntables to see Rick-James, but instead he was in the audience, flirting with some girls "OI! RICK-JAMES! STOP FLIRTING WITH THE AUDIENCE!" I shouted as everyone went to go change as Val set up my iPod.

"WELCOME LADIES, GENTLEMEN, CHILDREN, AND PIRATES, TO THE SHOW! Please remember to put money in the bag whenever you guys want. OK RICK-JAMES, HIT IT!" I said with my new loud voice powers to shout to the audience. Rick-James was at the turn-tables with my iPod and some records ready and turned on the first song, _**Lose My Breath**_. The girls only danced and sang. Next up was _**Don't Phunk with My Heart**_. Now this one, everyone, including the now lyric-knowing Zoro. Hey, did you know that Rick-James can rap? Lets say that that talent of his comes in handy for rapping songs.

_I will never understand Bri's cramming method. If this works, I'll swear I'll run around the island with nothing but my bikini on... well, here we go!_

Girls: No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart  
Yeah...  
No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...  
I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?  
I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?

Randy: Girl, you know you got me, got me,  
With your pistol shot me, shot me  
And I'm here helplessly,  
In love and nothing can stop me.  
You can't stop me cause once I start it  
Can't return me cause once you bought it  
I'm coming baby, dont got it,  
dont make me wait  
So lets be about it

Girls: No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...

Rick-James: Baby, have some trustin', trustin'  
When I come in lustin', lustin'  
Cause I bring you that comfort  
I aint only here cause I want ya  
body I want your mind too  
Interestin' what I find you  
And I'm interested in the long haul  
Come on girl, yee-haw!

Grant: Come on!

Girls: I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby  
I wonder if I take you home, Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby  
No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...

David: Girl, you had me, once you kissed me  
My love for you is not iffy  
I always want you with me  
I'll play Bobby and youll play Whitney  
If you smoke, I'll smoke too  
Thats how much I'm in love with you  
Crazy is what crazy do  
Crazy in love, I'm a crazy fool

Girls: No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...

Al: Why are you so insecure  
When you got passion and love her?  
You always claimin I'm a cheater  
Think I'd up and go leave ya  
For another senorita  
You forgot that I need ya  
You mustve caught amnesia  
Thats why you dont believe

Chuck: uh, yeah, check it out!

Grant: Dont you worry bout a thing, baby,  
Cause you know you got me by a string, baby  
Dont you worry bout a thing, baby  
Cause you know you got me by a string, baby

Zoro: Baby girl, you make me feel,  
You know you make me feel so real  
I love you more than sex appeal  
Cause you're...

All Guys: That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl

Girls: No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...  
No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...  
No, no, no, dont phunk with my heart...

Guys (At the same time as the girls): That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl.  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl.  
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl.

Girls: I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?  
I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?  
I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?  
I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?  
I wonder if I take you home,  
Would you still be in love, baby in love, baby?

Chuck: Dont you worry bout a thang, baby,  
Cause you know you got me by a strang, baby,  
Dont you worry bout a thang, baby,  
'Cause you know you got me by a strang, baby...

After that song came another song that we were all in. My younger sister can't listen to this song because it was the song that she and her ex dubbed as 'their song'. It's _**Promiscuous**_

Bobby-Joe: How you doin young lady?  
That feelin that you givin really drives me crazy  
You dont haveta play about the joke  
I was at a loss of words first time that we spoke

Ashley: Looking for a girl thatll treat you right,  
You lookin for her in the daytime with the light

Randy: You might be the type if I play my cards right  
I'll find out by the end of the night

Gabbie: You expect me to just let you hit it  
But will you still respect me if you get it?

Pete: All I can do is try, gimme one chance  
Whats the problem I dont see no ring on your hand  
I be the first to admit it,  
I'm curious about you, you seem so innocent

Val: You wanna get in my world, get lost in it,  
boy I'm tired of running, lets walk for a minute

All Guys: Promiscuous girl, wherever you are,  
I'm all alone, and it's you that I want

All Girls: Promiscuous boy, you already know,  
that I'm all yours, what you waiting for?

All Guys: Promiscuous girl, you're teasing me,  
you know what I want, and I got what you need.

All Girls: Promiscuous boy, let's get to the point,  
'cause we're on a roll, are you ready?

Bri: Roses are red, some diamonds are blue  
Chivalry is dead but you're still kinda cute

Zoro: Hey! I can't keep my mind off you  
Where you at, do you mind if I come through?

Zoey: I'm out of this world come with me to my planet,  
Get you on my level do you think that you can handle it?

David: They call me Thomas, last name Crown  
Recognize game, I'm a lay mine's down

Ana: I'm a big girl I can handle myself,  
But if I get lonely I'ma need your help  
Pay attention to me I don't talk for my health

Al: I want you on my team

Maggie: So does everybody else.

Bobby-Joe: Baby we can keep it on the low.  
Let your guard down aint nobody gotta know  
If you with it girl I know a place we can go

Jessica: What kind of girl do you take me for?

All Guys: Promiscuous girl,  
wherever you are, I'm all alone,  
and it's you that I want

All Girls: Promiscuous boy,  
you already know, that I'm all yours,  
what you waiting for?

All Guys: Promiscuous girl,  
you're teasing me,  
you know what I want, and I got what you need.

All Girls: Promiscuous boy, let's get to the point,  
'cause we're on a roll, are you ready?

All Guys: Don't be mad, don't get mean

All Girls: Don't get mad, don't be mean

All Guys: Hey! Don't be mad, don't get mean

All Girls: Don't get mad, don't be mean

Chuck: Wait! I don't mean no harm,  
I can see you with my t-shirt on

Val: I can see you with nothing on,  
feeling on me before you bring that on

All Guys: Bring that on?

All Girls: You know what I mean

Zoro: Girl, Im a freak you shouldn't say those things

Zoey: I'm only trying to get inside your brain,  
to see if you can work me the way you say

All Guys: It's okay, it's alright,  
I got something that you gon' like.

All Girls: Hey is that the truth or are you talking trash?  
Is your game M.V.P. like Steve Nash?

All Guys: Promiscuous girl, wherever you are,  
I'm all alone, and it's you that I want

All Girls: Promiscuous boy, you already know,  
that I'm all yours, what you waiting for?

All Guys: Promiscuous girl, you're teasing me,  
you know what I want, and I got what you need.

All Girls: Promiscuous boy, let's get to the point,  
'cause we're on a roll, are you ready?

Girls: Promiscuous Boy, I'm calling your name,  
but you're driving me crazy, the way you're making me wait

Guys: Promiscuous Girl, you're teasing me,  
you know what I want, and I got what you need!

Girls: Promiscuous Boy, we're one in the same,  
so we don't gotta play games no more!

After that, we did a few songs that we weren't all in, like **_One Step Closer, Until the Day I Die, Bad Boy, Waitin' on the World to Change, Dance, Dance, Faint, Before he Cheats, Shut up and Drive, Bleed it Out, Misery Business, Rockstar, Girlfriend, Headstrong, Shut Up!, Run it!, Temperature, Sk8er Boi, Everytime we Touch, Listen to your Heart, _**and**_ Call me when You're Sober_**. We finally finished it off with **_Hey Mama_**

Girls: La la la la la...

All: Hey mama, this that beat that make you groove, mama.  
Get on the floor and move your booty mama  
We the blast masters blastin' up the jamma

All Guys: REEEEEEEWIIIIIIND!

Rick-James: Cutie cutie, make sure you move your booty  
Shake that thing like we in the city of sin, and  
Hey shorty, I know you wanna party,  
the way your body lookin' make me really feel naughty  
Cutie cutie, make sure you move your booty,  
Shake that thing like we in the city of sin, and  
Hey shorty, I know you wanna party  
the way your body lookin' make me really feel naughty

David: I got a naughty naughty style and a naughty naughty crew  
But everything I do, I do just for you  
I'm a little bit of old, and a bigger bit of Nu  
The true people know that the Peas come thru, we never cease

All: NOO!

Grant: We never die, no we never decease,

All: NOO!

Chuck: We multiply like we mathamatice,  
An then drop bombs cause we shake it to da beat

All Guys: The bomb bombas, the base move dramas.

Pete: Naw y'all knaw, who we are  
Y'all knaw, we the stars  
Steady rockin' on y'alls boulevards  
And, lookin' hard without bodygaurds  
I do, what I can  
Y'all come thru, will.i.am  
And still I stand, with still mic in hand  
So come on mama, dance to the drama!

All: Hey mama, this that beat that make you groove, mama  
Hey! Get on the floor and move your booty mama  
Yaw! We the blast mastas blastin' up the jamma  
Hey! So shake your bambama, come on now mama  
Hey mama, this that beat that make you groove, mama  
Hey! get on the floor and move your booty mama  
Yaw! we the blast mastas blastin' up the jamma

Girls: La la la la la

Rick-James: We the big town stumpas, and big sound pumpas  
The beat bump bumps in your trunk trunkas  
The girlies in the club with the big plump plumpas  
And when I'm makin' love, my hip hump humps  
It never quits,  
I dont discriminate I please chicks  
Asian, Caucasian, Black just wanna squeeze-

Girls: aahhh!

Al: Cause we the show stoppas  
And the chief rockas, number one chief rockas

Val: Naw y'all knaw, who we are  
Y'all knaw, we the stars  
Steady rockin' on y'alls boulevards

Guys: How we rockin' it girls?

Girls: Without bodyguards.

Guys: Now she be

Ashley: Fergie!

Guys: from the crew,

Maggie: B.E.P., come and take heed,  
as we take the lead  
So come on papa, dance to the drama!

All: Hey mama, this that beat that make you groove, mama  
Get on the floor and move your booty mama  
We the blast mastas blastin' up the jamma

Rick-James: Cutie cutie, make sure you move your booty,  
Shake that thing like we in the city of sin,  
Hey shorty, I know you wanna party  
The way your body lookin' make me really feel naughty  
Cutie cutie, make sure you move your booty  
Shake that thing like we in the city of sin, and

Zoey: No fakin' I know you see me shakin'  
and the way I break it down I got the whole world quakin!  
Off the Richter, off the Richter,  
off the Richter, off the Richter,  
off the Richter, off the Richter steady are you ready?

All: Hey mama, this that beat that make you groove, mama  
Get on the floor and move your booty mama  
We the blast mastas blastin' up the jamma  
So shake your bam bama, come on now mama  
Hey mama, this that beat that make you groove, mama  
Get on the floor and move your booty mama  
We the blast mastas blastin' up the jamma

Girls: La la la la la...

Finally, it was over and we counted our money.

"Well, if you add the money that we had to start with, we have about 100,000 beli." Nami sighed out. My class and I started to cheer until Chopper said,

"But that's only gonna get us a ship smaller than the Merry!" He and Ussop started to cry at the thought of their lost boat. The rest of us had worried looks on our faces

"Well, that's it! We're f--ked." Rick-James said as he sat down on a rock with his face in his hands.

"All that dancin' for nothin'. No puedo creer que trabajamos as que duro maldito y nosotros conseguimos un tamao de la mierda del dinero para un barco clasificado mierda. Esto sopla..." David said as he reverted to the language of his ancestors.

_Man, I wish I paid more attention in Spanish class now._

"Can you speak in English?! Not all of us passed Spanish class damnit!" Pete shouted with some stress in his voice. Chip hopped off of his owner's shoulder and on to Ana's, who comforted the scared Spider Monkey.

"Oh it's on!"

"You and your parents are nothing but a bunch of fence hoppers!"

"Usted no es nada sino un bastardo!"

"I heard the word bastard in there!"

"Pozo qu lo hacen usted saban? El retraso mudo del asno puede pensar!"

"Verdammen sie es! Sie sind nichts aber ein stummer esel ungltiger zaunberbrcker!"

"Great, now they're both speaking languages that we don't know. I knew I should have taken Pete up on that learning German offer." Chuck said sarcastically.

"Now's not the time for jokes Chuck!" Nami said as she hit him over the head.

"Hey! He was just tryin' ta lighten the mood a bit!" Ana said before she and Nami started to argue. Chip jumped from Ana's shoulder to Maggie's, who sat in a corner with her head in her hands.

_My God. How has our family fallen so far...and so fast?_ Yeah, I know, laugh at me because I call my classmates family. But my school is small. These 19 classmates of mine are all we have for our grade. Heck, we only have four people graduating this year because we're so damn small and in all, our school has around 300 people, even though we go from Kindergarten to High School. But we're a family. And to see this happen to us...it just kills me.


	8. Restoring the faith

My Class Meets One Piece: Restoring the Faith

* * *

"Warum hältst du nich einfach mal die klappe! Warum kriechen Sie in einem Loch nicht nur und sterben?! (1) Pete shouted as he attempted to kick David in the chest. David glared at Pete before grabbing the attacking foot in his hand and yelling, 

"¡Yo no tengo ninguna idea lo que usted dice, pero tiene que ser un insulto usted bastardo!" (2) Pete made a punching motion with his hand, but David was surprised to see that Chip was in the air, ready to attack. He let go of Pete's foot and tried his hardest to get the monkey off his head.

Alex and Nami weren't physically fighting, they were just using words. You know that old saying, 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me?' Bullshit. I've gone through people hurting me mentally in Middle School and you could never pay me enough to go back. After all, girls can be the most violent of all people. The phrase does go, "Hell hast no fury like a **_woman_** scorned', isn't it?

"You don't always have to be so hardcore and heartless Nami! When we're stressed, we always try to make a joke up to lighten the mood, it's what we do!"

"Joking around isn't going to help us get money for a new boat Ana!"

"Yeah, but if people just keep on working and not take a little time to calm down and have fun, people go insane!"

Needless to say with all of the arguing, I was developing a headache bigger than Alaska. And when I have headaches, I get **_REALLY_** irritable. And my right eye was twitching like mad.

_Shut up goddamnit...shut up...can't they just be quiet...Jeez, I feel like I'm in the middle of my parents 'Once a month argument'..._

"Hey Zoey, can you do a little crowd control so I can knock some sense into them?" Bri asked as she pushed her red rectangular reading glasses up her nose.

"Don't need to ask me twice Bri." I cleared my throat "...SHUT THE F&#K UP!" I shouted, making it louder with my new powers. Everyone got real quiet real fast.

"What the hell are we doing? Fighting about money? So what if it's not enough to get a new boat? We're smart, we can figure it out!" Bri said.

"I know you guys are smart, but I don't know about them." Ussop said bluntly as he pointed his thumb towards the fighting duo that was Pete and David. Sanji took care of them by kicking each of them in the head.

"OW! Que era- I mean, what was that for?!" David asked as he, Pete, and Chip the monkey rubbed their new bumps forming on their heads.

"You shit-heads are making the girls angry." He replied as he lit another cigarette.

"Yeah, but Monkey-boy over here insulted me and my family. No one does that and gets away with it!" David complained as he put Pete and Chip the monkey in a choke hold. Grant hit him in the head, releasing the now blue Pete and pet monkey. Once Pete had oxygen in his lung, he scolded David,

"Oh yeah, you called me a bastard! I outta punch your face in!" I sighed.

"Ashley, can you separate the fighting couple?" Val asked. The Canadian just rolled her eyes and used her powers to move them away on different pieces of earth.

_Ah yes, gotta love them Devil Fruit powers. Dear Devil Fruit powers, what would we do without you? Oh! I know! We'd be boring! I don't like being boring, it's no fun at all! Yay for being weird!_

"So what if he called you that?" Maggie said boldly, "We're family dumb asses. And right now, we need a boat to win this race. And Bri's right, it's stupid to fight about something that we can easily fix if we calm down and talk about it." I'm pretty darn sure we were all shocked. Maggie never said so many words in a sentence!

"You're not just family," Luffy said with a smile, "You're our nakama, and we're even closer than family." I smiled.

_He many be a complete idiot, but he has his moments, just like in the manga and anime…that's it, Luffy must have A.D.H.D._

* * *

"Hey ya'll, we gotta lead on who made the ship go BOOM!" We heard Fort Knox shout. The trio was back with a little boy dressed to work in a boiler room.

"This is Anaguma. He was going to stow away on our boat, but saw someone load dynamite in it." Brian introduced us.

_Wait a minute, doesn't 'anaguma' mean 'badger'? What in the world were his parents thinking when they named the poor child?! "Hey! Let's give our kid a lousy name so he can grow up to be all emo!" Well at least it's not as bad as the daughter of Governor Hogg. Poor Ima Hogg…_

"Who was it?! Who blew up my sweet Kaya-chan's gift?! Who blew up the Going Merry?!" Ussop demanded as he grabbed the Anaguma's overalls and shook the little boy so hard I thought the kid's head would fall off.

"It was...it was a man who's part of the crew that my Grandpa an' I work for." Anaguma murmured after we were able to stop Ussop from killing the kid with all of his shaking.

"What crew is that? It sounds real scary." Chopper asked in a scared voice as he poked his head out from behind Zoro.

"Did that moose just talk?!" The boy asked in a shout. Chopper quickly changed into his big body builder form while yelling,

"I'M A REINDEER YOU STUPID HUMAN!" Anaguma hid behind Brian and shouted,

"THAT'S EVEN WEIRDER!" Chopper shrunk back to his normal, cute form and hid behind Zoro. Rick-James put both of his hands on Anaguma's shoulders and asked in a serious voice,

"But seriously dude, what crew are you on?" I raised my eyebrows and added today into my mental 'Remember this Day' list. It's not everyday that you hear Rick-James talk in a serious tone. I've only heard him should like this for three different reasons: Either he was playing basketball, really, really tired, or angry.

"I'm...I'm on General Gasparde's crew." Anaguma answered grimly.

_Again with that name! First we heard it in that pirate place and now here! Who the hell is he?! _

"Well then why don't we go around and ask anyone what they know about him?" Luffy asked.

"We already tried that, ya'll. But when we talked to people 'bout it, everyone we asked had the same answer." T.J. reported.

"What was the answer?" Sanji asked.

"'AAAHHH! AAAAAHHHH! AAAAHHHH! AAAAHHHH!' and then they would run away like a pig running from a butcher when it was its turn in line to be turned inta bacon." he answered.

_Mmmmm…bacon…_

"Not ta mention, all Anaguma knows is that he's mean, enjoys toying with people, and he's got a high bounty cuz he used ta be in the Marines, but he took over one of their ships and became a pirate. He also ate a Devil's Fruit like ya'll did. He don't know much more cuz he an' his grandpa work in the boiler room." Brian reported.

"Thank you for the information Storm-san, Bone-san, Cut-san, and Anaguma. But one question still remains unanswered: How are we going to raise money?" Robin asked us. Al's eyes lit up as a light bulb lit above his head.

_Holy shit! Was that a light bulb doing off above his head? Hang on..._ _AL__ HAS AN IDEA?! HOLY SHIZNAT, THERE IS A GOD AFTER ALL!_

"I don't see why we didn't think of this before! We're pirates for cryin' out loud! We don't listen to the rules, so all we hafta do is just steel a ship from a carpenter!" There was a long pause.

"THAT'S A BRILLIANT IDEA!" Luffy, Chopper, and Ussop shouted at the same time. Until the rest of us bluntly said, "No it isn't." Al seemed to be glowing in a magical spotlight that appeared from nowhere. But after hearing our reply to his idea, he got those anime comical tears flowing down his face and curled up in the fetus posistion.

"Hmph. I don't see why no one thought of it earlier." Zoro sighed out as he crossed his arms.

_Gya! Now I remember why Zoro is one of the most wanted guys of One Piece by girls back home! He's got that 'I'm bad ass and I know it' air! Wait, I can't think of stuff like this right now! I need to concentrate on what's going on right now! Stupid ferret-long attention span! Hey look! A shiny coin! SHINY! Wait! Stop it Zoey! Jeez Zoey, you're such a baka! Baka baka baka baka baka!_

"I thought of it before Merry blew up!" Ussop bragged/lied. Luffy and Chopper got stars in their eyes.

"Really?!" They asked with excitement.

"No way." We all said before he could answer and make up more stories/lies. Before Ussop could even begin to cry besides Al, Alison's quiet voice was heard saying,

"Hey ya'll…I think I may have an idea on how to get a boat."

* * *

Translations:

(1) Just shut your mouth why don't you! Why don't you just crawl in a hole and die?!

(2) I have no idea what you are saying, but it has got to be an insult, you bastard!


	9. Let the Games Begin!

My Class Meets One Piece 10: Let the Game Begin!

* * *

About an hour after Jessica told us her plan, we started getting prepared. For the most part, that went off without a hitch That is, until I had to get dressed. What were we wearing? Let's just say to make sure that Sanji's cause of death wasn't due to loss of blood through the nasal passages, he had a blindfold on. 

**_"I'M NOT WEARING IT DAMNIT!" _**I shouted from my hiding spot behind some bushes. Everyone was getting frustrated with me and my refusal to wear the agreed upon clothing for Operation: Get-a-boat-so-we-can-win-the-race-and-get-lotsa-money. The plan was also known as Operation: Get a boat. With a twitch of her eye, Nami's voice snapped back,

"Zoey, you better wear it or Kami-sama help me, I'll wring your scrawny neck! " Rick-James poked his head into the bushes where I was hiding and said,

"Just wear the damn thing Zoey, 'cause I bet good money on us to win the f!#king race!" A blush spread across my face making me look reader than an overripe tomato (if that's even possible). I covered myself to the best of my ability as I kicked the guy out of my view and into a wall, leaving a footprint on his face.

**_" HENTAI NO BAKAYARO_**(1)**_ RICK-JAMES!"_**

"OK, that's it Zoey!" Ana said as she grabbed my arm from the bushes and jerked me from my hiding spot. The red on my face spread to the rest of my body as Sanji fainted because he took off his blindfold. I felt like I was in "Girls Gone Wild". Side note there, I've never seen that show, but I've heard enough about if from Rick-James to know what it's about. I was wearing a turquoise swim suit, but it was one that I would NEVER wear, even it I was stone drunk. The top barely covered the breasts, making me look flatter than normal and the bottom felt more like a thong. I should probably mention that all of the girls, Nami and Robin included, were wearing this kind of swim suit in different colors.

"I feel like this top is cutting off the circulation in my boobs...and can someone wake up Sanji-hentai before he dies? No, wait, ignore that last statement." I murmured as I kicked Sanji's fallen form and crossed my arms in front of myself to try and keep warm in the cold night. Chopper stuffed lots of tissues up Sanji's nose while we went over the plan just to make sure.

"OK then, everyone got it?" Jessica asked from the huddle. We all nodded, but Luffy asked,

"I don't get it, how're you gonna know the guard out like that?" Randy put a shoulder around Luffy and said,

"All in good time my naïve captain. All in good time..."

"In the mean time," Al said as he pat Luffy's back, "We need to give you a little talk that we know as 'The Birds and The Bees'."

"What do birds and bees hafta do with this?"

" ...please tell me that he knows what we're talkin' 'bout. I was scarred for life hearing about it in middle school; I don't wanna go through it again." Brian said with a sweatdrop forming behind his head.

"Nope."

"Damn..."

"Maybe we should tell Anaguma about it too..."

"Poor kid's gonna be scarred for life." Oh yeah, Anaguma told us that he wanted to go back to his Grandpa on Gasparde's boat, so we're gonna take him there. What? Did you think we were cruel enough to just drop the kid in the ocean and say, 'Good luck finding them'? Well, if you did...to be honest I'm not surprised really.

* * *

While the guys told Luffy the wonders of how a baby is born, the rest of us got ready to start Operation: Get a Boat. The boat yard was in our line of eyesight and there was a single guard. He looked like he would rather be anywhere else but here. He appeared middle-aged, maybe old enough to be coming out of his mid-life crisis. 

_Great. This guy's about the same age as my dad. Oh boy... I'm gonna have to go to a hell of A LOT of confessions at church and shrinks to get this off my mind and conscious..._

"Everyone ready?" Ashley asked.

"I'm just gonna say this now so ya'll don't have an excuse for sayin' that you didn't hear me...no good can come from this at all." Maggie said as she shook her head side to side.

"Didn't need to tell me that, I already know it." Gabbie said as she adjusted her top.

"Well, if that's it, the let's go." Bri said. I gulped as I nodded with everyone else.

_Oh dear God in heaven please forgive me for what I'm about to do. I didn't want to even do it in the first place, so does that count? Please say that it does._

With that, we came out from our hiding spots and walked over to the guard very seductively.

"Excuse us sir," Nami purred out. We decided that she and Val would do all the talking. After all, Val once argued with a store clerk long enough to get the price on a dress to go from 150 dollars to 90, "We reeeaaallly need your help..." I rolled my eyes when she dragged on the 'really', but managed to stop before he noticed.

The man seemed to sweat just by looking at us. Why not? We were ten teenaged girls in clothes that a hooker would probably wear in the heart of Las Vegas or New York City.

"Shu-shu-sure! Wha-what can I he-help you lovely ladies wi-with?" he asked.

_Sounds like someone's been smoking one too many cigarettes lately..._

"We're in that big ol' race, but someone sank our only boat! Do you think a smart, strong man like yourself can sell us one?" Val pouted as some of us hugged the man.

_Oh boy,no male can resist her pout. Even the gay ones can't. I really gotta find out how she does that!_

"Bu-bu-but I'm nuh-not a real kar-carpenter," He started to stutter out before Nami ran a finger under his chin and said,

"That's ok. All we need to see is the biggest boat you have." That was the signal. Summoning the little dignity I had left, I hugged him with everyone else. With all of us in his face, he was knocked out from a nosebleed in no time. With him out of the way, I rubbed some blood off my swimsuit while everyone dropped him.

"I can't believe it worked." Maggie said in disbelief.

"It is official ya'll, I've seen and done everything now." Val said as she shook her head back and forth. Jessica raised an eyebrow and said,

"You really gotta think before you speak Val, that sounded SO wrong."

"Awh! Get the image out of my head!"

**_

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

_**

"Zoey! Zoey, remember, every time you hit your head you loose a hundred brain cells and a point on your IQ! Zoey...ZOEY!"

"I see flying pie...I like pie... I think I'll sing the pie song! OOOOhhhhh..."

"Does Reader-san do this often Knife-san?"

"You have no idea Robin, you have no idea..."

**_

THUMP!

_**

"ONE, TWO THREE! AND SHE'S DOWN FOLKS!"

"...Ok, for that Rick-James, YOU get to carry her onto the boat."

"F!#K!"

* * *

When I woke up, I was on a hard wooden floor that was gently rocking back and forth. I rubbed by eyes and stood up. What did I see? I saw that everyone was trying to figure out how to operate the ship we were on. It was a pretty nice one actually. The entire boat was a rich brown color, indicating that this boat had never sailed before. There were two main masts, which had two rectangular shaped sails hanging down on them. To my right was a door and on each side of the door were stairs leading up to a higher deck. It was the same on my left, only on the floor, there was a door leading somewhere else. At the front of the ship was a figurehead that looked like a panther about to pounce. Luffy was sitting on it, with a big grin on his face. 

Nami's voice interrupted my observation of our new boat.

"Guys! A gale is coming, get ready!"

"Hey Zoey!" someone shouted. I looked up to see Val was on the lowest mast, " 'bout time you woke up! C'mon up here, I need help untying something!"

_Good thing I'm not afraid of heights._

So I found a very unsteady rope ladder that took me up next to Val. She was struggling to get the last corner of the sail untied.

"Hurry up and get that sail undone ya'll or we're gonna miss that gale thing!" Pete ordered from his position in a crow's nest. Chip was clinging to him like...well, like a monkey to the last banana.

"Ok, from the looks of it, this goes here, and that goes there..." I murmured to Val as we tried to go as fast as we could with that knot.

"Thirty seconds until impact!" Nami announced to us. My left eye twitched as I shouted back,

"You don't need to tell us! We're doing the best we can!"

"Twenty seconds!"

_Clearly she doesn't care about us being stressed outta our minds...Damnit, I cave under pressure!_ Then Val's eyes lit up.

"Zoey, hang on. I'm gonna try and burn this rope. Just make sure that to put it out before it spreads, ok?" Before I could respond, she got a look of concentration on her face. The tip of one of her fingers caught on fire and she smiled. What finger was it? Let's just say Randy saw it and thought Val was flipping him off.

"Ten seconds!" Val put the tip of her finger on the rope, catching it on fire. When it broke through, I made sure to stop it from burning. Here's an interesting tidbit for you guys: putting out a fire by wetting your fingers and pinching the flame DOES indeed hurt.

"Hold on!" Nami shouted. Val and I didn't have enough time to get down on the deck, so we held on to the mast. No sooner than we put our arms around the wood, there was an enormous blast of air that sent the boat forward. Here's the weird thing, the path that we had to sail was going UP a mountain.

"Anyone else wonderin' how the hell we're gonna sail up a f!#king mountain?!" Grant asked as we got closer and closer.

"We'll just do what we did at the Reverse Mountain: sail on!" Nami said while Chopper steadied the boat. He was in his Human form and was at the wheel. After we got used to the wind pressure, we were able to freely walk around and Val and I were able to get off the mast. Well, I stayed up there because it had a really nice view.

"How is this even possible?!" Maggie asked from her position next to Nami.

"Our world is much more different that yours, Ghost-san," Robin stated. Maggie seemed a bit depressed that her new nickname was 'Ghost-san', " The things that occur in the Grand Line defy all logic that one might have known before sailing on it. Sometimes you can't even trust what's in front of your own eyes."

"That almost sounds a bit poetic." I whispered to myself.

"YOSHA! Here we go!" Luffy shouted in excitement as we actually started sailing up the mountain.

"I can't believe that it's working." Bri said in disbelief as she looked over the railings.

"Hey," Ussop said, breaking our amazement, "what are we gonna name the boat? People usually name their boats on their first journey.

"Oi! As captain, I say that we name it Bear Polar Bear Lion!"

"IT DOESN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE ANY OF THOSE THINGS!" we all shouted.

"I say we call it the S.S. Rick-James Bitches!"

"No."

"The Flying Monkey?"

"The figurehead is a panther Pete."

"I have an idea,;" Jessica whispered. We all looked at her, waiting to hear the name, "Well, back home, the Pro football team is the Panthers and they were able to go to the Super Bowl in 2004, despite being the underdogs. And the figurehead looks like a Panther about to attack. So maybe we would call it the 'Crouching Panther'."

I took some thought into consideration. The Carolina Panthers DID go to Super Bowl XXXVIII when everyone said it was impossible, giving us the nickname of the 'Cardiac Cats'. It was also the closest Super Bowl game that almost resulted in an over-time. And not to mention, they broke the record for the longest offensive play in Super Bowl history when Jake Delhomme threw Muhsin Muhammad an 85-yard touchdown pass. It sounded good to me! Ah, that was a good Super Bowl,too bad Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson had to ruin it. (2)

"I like it."

"Me too."

"I dunno what football it, but it sounds cool!"

"I think I can live with that."

"I think it's a great idea Jessie-chan!"

"So are we all in an agreement?"

"YEAH!"

"OK then! From now on our new nakama is Kouza Kurohyou!(3)" Luffy announced. Our shouts of happiness would have echoed throughout the island, but there it seemed like everyone who lived here came to see all of the ships off.

Now, most people say that the youngest child craves attention in life. Bullshit. I'm the oldest child of two younger sisters and I LOVE having people's attention on me. So when I saw everyone cheering at us (I pretended that the rest of the boats were nonexistent), I just HAD to go to the railing and wave to people.

"Hi everyone! Don't worry, we're gonna win this race!" I heard Ussop shouting to the people. Looking around the boat, it seemed like almost everyone except Zoro, Nami, and Robin were waving to our new audience. That is until we heard what they were saying to us,

"You guys better loose! I pet my life's savings on Gasparde!"

"I bet on the two giants, so don't you do anything to them or I'll hunt you down and rip your lungs out and feed them to ya!"

"If you do anything to make me loose my bet I'll wring your necks with my bare hands!"

Needless to say, this scared the shit out of us.

_I really miss the Southern hospitality of home right now! I've heard more death threats now than the day I went to visit one of the public schools back home._

The whiff of a combination of smog and something burning filled my nose. It sort of reminded me of New York City (4). I followed the scent to a large metal ship. It sort of looked like one of our steamboats back home gone wrong. Twin black clouds of smoke were leaking out from two pipes on the ship, making Bri and Ana go on a rant about Global Warming.

"That's Gasparde's ship, The Salamander. It's one of the first ships that doesn't use sails." Robin informed us.

"I don't see what's so special about it really. Back in our world, we have a bunch of ships like that that are even bigger and hold thousands of people." Al said in a bored tone. Maggie elbowed him in the ribs for that comment.

"Uhhh, guys," Chuck said from the crows nest, pulling our attention away from Gasparde's boat, "are you sure this is a mountain?"

"I'm pretty sure, why do you ask?" Nami asked.

"Cause the end of the water just drops right in front of us!" Now our attention was on the front of the boat. Sure enough, the water only continued for another 100 yards and then vanished.

"OH MY F!#KING GOD!"

* * *

Author's Notes: 

(1) HENTAI NO BAKAYARO RICK-JAMES!- roughly translates to: Rick-James you dumbass pervert!

(2) Sure, it was on the news, TV and newspaper, but I saw it first. (Yes, I was able to go to that Super Bowl. My dad knew someone who knew someone who knew someone who knew the MAN! So he took my sister, his dad, and I too the Super Bowl. Turns out that right before the third quarter, a streaker ran onto the field. He was tackled by Matt Chatham and that was ranked #50 on ESPN's Greatest Super Bowl Moments.)

(3) Kouza Kurohyou- roughly translates to 'Crouching Panther'

(4) I just know I'm gonna be flamed by some New Yorker about this so I'm just gonna clear things up: I've been to New York City hundreds of times and that's the best way I can describe it. To me, it really smells like smog, smoke, roasting chestnuts, and hotdogs.


	10. Waterfalls, fights, and Sea Kings, OMFG!

Chapter 10: Waterfalls, fights, and Sea Kings, OMFG!

* * *

I'll tell you the truth; I don't usually say the f-bomb. I only say it if I'm pissed, or too shocked to realize what I said. And neither do the girls in my class. But when we saw that the river we were sailing was going off the end of a cliff, we couldn't help but shout,

"OH MY F!#KING GOD!"

Trust me; you would scream too if you were witnessing what we were seeing.

"Idon'twannadie,Idon'twannadie,Idon'twannaDIE!" Al chanted in a corner with Ussop and Chopper. Rick-James fainted with his eyes rolled back and foam spraying from his mouth. Pete followed his lead and did the same. Chip, who just happened to be poached on Pete's shoulder, was squished underneath the shadow user before the poor monkey knew what happened,

"Oh good God in heaven!" Ashley shouted as she and Jessica tied themselves to one of the masts.

"YOSHA! Here it comes!" Luffy shouted from his position on the panther figurehead, a Monkey D. Luffy © smile stretched across his face.

"LUFFY YOU DUMBASS! STOP JUST SITTING THERE AND HELP US!" we scolded Luffy before we noticed that he was right; the boat was about to fall off the cliff. We all shouted,"OH GOD!" And the Crouching Panther fell down the waterfall. The only thing that Bobby-Joe could say to everyone was,

"Hold on tight ya'll!" To which Ana shouted right back to him,

"TO WHAT?!"

"To something solid, Ana!"

"SOMEONE HELP ME!"

"LUFFY! USSOP FELL OFF THE BOAT! GET HIM!" Jessica ordered our Captain. Luffy got off the figurehead and ran to the back of the boat. By now, poor Ussop was a good 50-something feet in the air behind us. The rubber Captain twisted his legs around the railing and stretched his arms out and grabbed the long-nosed sharpshooter. When he pulled Ussop back onto the boat, he was also passed out from fright much like Rick-James and Pete.

"Everybody brace yourselves!" Nami warned us.

_You don't need to tell me __twice!_ thought to myself as I hung on to the rope ladder going up the mast for dear life. No sooner had the words reached my ears did our boat hit the water. I looked behind the mast and Nami's face was bright blue and was mumbling something we couldn't understand.

"Excuse me for interrupting Navigator-san, but I don't think now is the right time to be overwhelmed." Robin calmly stated. We all looked around our ship and saw she was right; every boat except ours was fighting with one another!

_So this is what the life of a pirate is like... f!#king cool man! This sure as hell beats the boring shit we do at home!_

"What the hell are they doing?!" Ussop asked. Seemed like the sound of the cannons woke him up.

"The race has started Ussop," Zoro said with a small grin on his face.

"Right, from this point on, anything goes." Nami said.

_Well in that case, maybe Rick-James should do his "Men Gone Wild" stunt, that always works!_

Nami's loud orders disrupted my thoughts, "Ussop, go and guard the aft deck! Val, does anyone in your class have good aim?" Val answered with,

"David and Randy do, they go hunting every chance they can get. Bobby-Joe and Fort Knox may also be a good shot, but I'm not 100 sure."

"Alright then, David and Bobby-Joe, go guard the port side with the cannons! Randy, you and Fort Knox do the same thing with the starboard side!"

"Which one's which?"

"Port side is the left side Bobby-Joe!"

"Ya'lls left or my left? And which one is left?!"

"Bobby-Joe, now is not the right time to be dyslexic! The port side is THAT side! And will someone please wake Rick-James and Pete up!" Nami shouted as she pointed to the correct side of the boat to Bobby-Joe that was the real port side.

"We're on it ya'll!" Fort Knox replied as he, Bobby-Joe, David, and Randy took the stairs to go below deck. Ana quickly kicked Rick-James and Pete in the sides, causing them to wake up, before returning to help Ussop load the cannons. I looked ahead of us and saw that Gasparde was not that far in front of us. All the ships in his way either made sure they got out of his way ASAP or they were crushed by Gasparde's much bigger boat. Pretty soon, just about everyone on a crew was boarding someone else's ship and started to fight the people on it. Luffy watched all of this while sitting on the figurehead, laughing his head off.

One of the cannons on our port side went off, hitting the ship to our left. The person on the wheel tried to get back on course, but they wound up crashing onto shore and one of it's masts hit a rather tall building.

"Good job down there!" Chopper shouted down the stairs before returning to his position at the rudder.

"Hey, look over there! It looks like Bobby and Pongo are tryin' something out!" Jessica announced. We looked to our port side and saw that the two giants were heading straight towards the beached ship that we hit. It seemed like they were going to use that as a ramp to send them up into the air to the other side of the river, putting them ahead of everyone else.

"Hey Chuck, I betcha ten bucks they don't make it." T.J. proposed while flashing a ten dollar bill.

"Dude, I'm not stupid; there's no way in hell they're gonna make it." Chuck replied. He was right, the Giants hit the boat and went into the air, but wound up crashing halfway to the other side of the river. Seeing this, Nami turned around and ordered,

"Chopper, cut the helm!"

Now why did she want him to do this? Oh, maybe because we just happened to be going in the exact same direction Bobby and Pongo took before they tried to take off flying. Chopper however was struggling.

"I'm trying, but it won't budge!" he said as he put all his weight against it.

"What!? We'll crash at this rate!" Nami said. Hearing the word 'crash' Al instantly started to run around in circles with his arms in the air like a headless chicken.

"We'regonnacrashwe'regonnacrashwe'regonnaCRASH!!" He cried out with fake tears running down his face. I pulled a rather large spatula that my family uses to flip pancakes with and handed it to Jessica and Ashley. They grabbed it and took turns slapping Al with it before giving it back to me.

"Dude, you're not helping much so calm down before you blow a blood vessel in your brain!" I said.

"Hey, if I kicked the ship from below, would that cushion it?" Zoro asked. I could feel a sweat-drop forming behind my head after hearing that comment.

_Zoro, even though you win with the most amount of fangirls back home, you're still a big-ass BAKA!_

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" Nami shouted before her eyes lightened up with an idea, "Ah! A cushion! Luffy!" she called out to our Captain.

Next thing we knew, Luffy performed his ******_GOMU-GOMU NO FUUSEN(1) _**on the crashed boat, causing us to roll off him and go flying into the sky!

Ussop ran to the back of the boat and held out his hand, allowing Luffy to grab on.

"Y'know I don't wanna spoil the mood here, but WHAT THE HELL ARE WE GONNA DO NOW?!" Pete frantically asked. He was right, we were gonna suffer the same fate as Bobby and Pongo if someone didn't do anything soon!

**_"OROGRAPHIC CURRENT! (2)"_**Bri shouted while holding her arms straight out in front of her. A strong wind caught our sails, making us get a bit closer to the river. The wind only lasted for about five seconds before Bri had to stop it. Holding the ship with brand-new powers that you haven't gotten used to can really drain you. Poor Bri was sweating and panting heavily. Robin put her hand on Bri's shoulder and said,

"Thank you Wind-san for your help. I'll take it from here." The archeologist crossed her arms and said,

**_"GRAN FLUER!" _**A bunch of arms sprouted from the starboard side of the boat. Then they kept appearing by sprouting on top of one another until they reached the right side of the short and formed a large hand that grabbed a building near the water. The arms pulled us until we were safely in the water. Well, about as safe as one could be surrounded by fighting pirates.

"Good job Robin-chwan! You are amazing as always!" Sanji said while twirling around on a rather large heart.

"Do ya'll wonder where he gets those hearts?" Grant asked us. No one really raised their hands, so the topic dropped.

"It's almost unreal how some of this stuff happens. I'm surprised we've lasted this long to be honest." Ussop said as we continued sailing onto the river as it became part of the sea.

"Ya'll haven't seen anything yet Ussop. Just stick around, things get much stranger when you're with us." Maggie said with a small smile on her face. Everyone's jaws almost dropped; Maggie spoke more than five sentences in one week!

"Oh, by the way, thank you Robin! Everything went just like I planned!" Nami said as she sat down on the stairs. Zoro couldn't help but shout,

"LIAR!"

"Well, now that we're on our way, we might as well enjoy the ride." Robin suggested.

"Good idea Robin." David said after coming up the stairs from below deck with Fort Knox, Randy, and Bobby-Joe. Randy's eyes darted across the deck before asking,

"Hey, have any of ya'll seen Anaguma lately? I haven't see him since we boarded the ship." There was a long pause before Val said,

"See **THAT'S **the reason why none of ya'll should have any kids when ya'll are older!"

"Hey, it's not like someone told us to watch him!"

"OK, everyone split up and search for him. Wait, Zoro, you stay where you are and I'll make sure we stay on course." Nami ordered.

"THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN NAMI?!"

"Hey Zoey, what does Nami mean anyway?"

"Oh, basically to make up for him being so freakishly strong, Oda-sensei designed him to have a lousy sense of direction Fort Knox.

"How bad is that?"

"He thinks that the direction North is up."

"Well at least as not as bad as Ryouga from Ranma 1/2, right Zoey? He could get lost in his own house."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about him Ana."

* * *

Fast forward 2 hours later

Well, it took us two hours, but we found Anaguma. He was hiding in a chest full of cannon balls. Don't ask me what he was thinking because I've got no clue. And after that, since we couldn't see any other ships, Sanji started to make us lunch.

_Ah yes! Finally, I get to try some more of Sanji's food! And since I'm a girl, Sanji will let us have first dibs!_

I was about to offer Sanji some help, only to be interrupted by Anaguma shouting,

"I can't take this anymore! Goddamnit, why won't you all kill me already?! I'm no use to anyone, so go on and kill me." I could tell by the looks on my classmates faces that his words were like stabbing a knife in our hearts.

"Don't you think you're treating your own life a bit lightly?" Nami asked as she looked at the boy from her seat at the table.

"I don't need to be lectured by a pirate," Anaguma said as he sate on the ground, "Why should I care? There's no reason to keep living without any hope. I'd be better off not existing at all." At this, Rick-James stood up, walked up to Anaguma and punched him straight in the jaw.

"You can't keep living because you have no hope? That's the most retarded thing I've ever heard! You said that you have a Grandpa to take care of you, so what about him? At least you have someone! My parents aren't really my parents. I've never met my birth mom or birth dad and how do you think I felt when I found out that I was the result of a one night stand with a 16 year-old girl and some random guy working at a carnival?!" Val stood up and then slapped Anaguma on the other side of his face, saying,

"You think your life is so bad? Try walking a mile in my shoes then. I was an alcoholic and addicted to painkillers by the time I was eleven and I was arrested when I was twelve! The only reason why I didn't go to jail is because they pitied me! They felt sorry for me! So when they returned me to my parents, they sent me to a f!#king mental hospital where I was put on suicide watch! But I'm still here and you wanna know why?" Val didn't wait for him to answer, "It's because even when you think ya'll are at the lowest possible point you could be, there's always the chance that it can get better. It because of that, I'm not dead right now. Besides, if you're alive, then you can't talk about dying!" My mouth was on autopilot and I couldn't stop myself from saying,

"Anaguma, you're young and that means that the best is yet to come. If you keep thinking that it's only gonna get worse, then it is! I should know because at one point I thought it could only get worse. I had to leave all my friends and family behind when I was nine and when I was twelve, I saw my best f!#king friend die right in front of my own eyes.**(3)** Everyone made fun of and ridiculed just because I was different than them. So if you think you're the only person here who's got some problems, then you're dead wrong," I motioned my hand to all my classmates, who were standing up and glaring at the boy, "Because all of us have gone through some shitty stuff but it's those things that made us who we are today."

"Oi, lunch is ready!" Sanji announced. Our ADHD minds were distracted by the smell of food, so we rushed to the table, leaving Anaguma very confused as he continued to shake in a corner.

* * *

FF 2 hours later

I was trying to relax a bit before dinner, but that idea crashed the moment another ship fired a cannon at us.

"Oh c'mon! Can't we get one f!#king break around here?!" Rick-James yelled to the sky, as if someone was going to answer him. The captain of the other ship started to go off on a monolog, but we just ignored him.

"Who is that?"

"I dunno, but he's getting annoying."

"So which one of ya'll is gonna fight them?"

"Now I remember! He was close to us at the beginning of the race!"

"I thought we were in last place."

"Apparently he's in last place Chopper." The other ships Captain heard this and demanded,

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY?!"

"He got mad when he heard the truth!"

"I don't think that was the smartest thing to say Luffy!" I don't think Ussop could take anymore because he fired an egg from his slingshot into the Captain's face. This gave Zoro and Sanji enough time to jump onto the other ship and start attacking.

_A Zoro and Sanji fighting team! GOD DOES EXIST! _

Of course just when the fight started, both boats started shaking and rose into the air. We all ran to the railings to see what was going on and we all just about fainted. Why?

"JESUS, VIRGIN MARY, ON A SLICE OF TOAST! WE'RE ON A SEA KINGS HEAD!"

* * *

Authors Notes

(1) Gomu-Gomu no Fuusen: Translates as 'Gum-Gum Balloon'

(2) Orographic Current: Orographic is a type of wind that tends to lift things up, hence this move that helps keep the boat in the air

(3) This is somewhat true. When I was 12, my best friend at the time was my pet dog, Rider. We had to put him down because he had cancer. Six months earlier he had an operation and we thought they got rid of it, but apparently we where wrong because it spread to his chest and leg. It was either amputate the leg and he lives a painful year or put him down. I had Rider since I was three so This was like loosing my best friend and brother all at the same time.


End file.
